sampleSizeOfOne

And flies out. Jeffers still at 1st, 2 out in the 8th. Pitching change to welcome the top of our order. Come on top of the order! Come out on top!

Cave pinch hits for Simmons...

Jeffers!

I'll start with a baserunner or two...

4-1. Another homer. Sigh.

Not that this has anything to do with the game. Sorry.

Me too (regarding Dobnak catching breaks next season) Evokes a scene from a movie "well (gosh darn it) is there anywhere it doesn't hurt? .... We never seem to catch break..." What is keeping Mr. Albers from being the next Thielbar, only starting?

No no, not one.

Except it ends early... Sigh. Can't do nothing right...

Yeah... I had hope. Even up to the point where the catch/fumble/targetting review happened. Still optimistic for the season even though they didn't tumble the buckeyes...

Line up is left heavy, so perhaps a strategic choice.

He was part of the Ben Revere haul, no? And Ben had that iconic catch following the Boston Marathon Bomb. Biter was better known as Orcrist, if i remember the Hobbit well (although i wouldn't fault someone for dredging up Glamdring instead) Sorry for the eratic chain of consciousness post...

Welcome to the "Worst Game Thread Intro Ever", a game thread where nothing is ordinary, and everything is superlative. Nuance? what is that? (But sampleSize, why worst, rather than best? Surely you should write good things? Well, Rhetorical Question, that would be selfish) I confess, I didn't like to see Andrew Albers go down. Sure, he had a little trouble last outing. But at least i have the next best thing. I get to write in favor of another working man's pitcher: Randy Dobnak. But i go to cut and paste the line up, lo and behold, his name is no longer there, and Albers is back up. I am torn... Did my secret desire jinx Mr. Dobnak? Is it my fault he has this set back? This guilt will rack me forever! Or at least until someone says something else in this thread, or the game starts, which ever happens first. Dobnak who threw the craftiest sinker on the planet, is now replaced by the wiliest lefty this side of Constantinople (so wily, it is now Istanbul, according to They Might Be Giants) in Andrew Albers! How crafty is he? Last time out, the umpires called a balk on his craftiness! And because i'm too lazy to put into words how i approve those who worked hard to get here (like Dobnak and Albers) here is music so don't have to: Anyway, lineups are out, so without further ado... Minnesota: 0. Andrew Albers (L) P Craftiest 1. Luis Arraez (L) 2B Elevenaciousest 2. Jorge Polanco (S) DH Switchiest 3. Josh Donaldson (R) 3B Rainiest 4. Max Kepler (L) RF Repliablest 5. Miguel Sano (R) 1B Stretchiest 6. Brent Rooker (R) LF Timeliest 7. Nick Gordon (L) CF Luckiest 8. Ben Rortvedt (L) C Sharpest 9. Andrelton Simmons (R) SS Subtlest Cleveland (Ohio) 0. Cal Quantrill (R) P 1. Myles Straw (R) CF 2. Amed Rosario (R) SS 3. Jose Ramirez (S) 3B 4. Franmil Reyes (R) DH 5. Harold Ramirez (R) LF 6. Yu Chang (R) 1B 7. Owen Miller (R) 2B 8. Austin Hedges (R) C 9. Oscar Mercado (R) RF

These characterizations made reading this thread worth it to me. Thanks! I will have to get back to you on "worst signing ever." I feel it would take a handwriting specialist to make that claim...

Did we just catch Kansas City? Good for us.

It is a delicate balance to achieve, isn't it? Like Dobnak trusting his sinker...

Look at the wattles on that one!

Is he starting tomorrow? (i should know, but i ain't been paying attention...)

We are in accord...

Concur. This strikes a chord with me.

Suppose you're right... Rome wasn't built in a day.

Yeah, but has Ryan done it yet? Means he still has something to prove...

These banter tracks are side by side...

Jeffers corals the foultip for a strike out!

Thielbar! Keep it going!