Blake

And Sano.

Uh, so I screwed up thinking I had screwed up? How'd I mess that up?

I saw this and nearly had a conniption. I thought perhaps I'd screwed something up. Though, at the rate I'm going, getting it right is more surprising than a screw-up.

Disclaimer: This post in no way is meant to endorse the weighing and burning of the Mother-in-Law, no matter how much she may resemble that which is depicted in this opener. Instead, please leave the determination of witchitude to those who are more qualified, such as those depicted in the documentary above. Thank you and have a nice day. -Documentary producers everywhere.

Last night, the Twins...never mind, that's all in the past, let's look to the future, the Twins playing KC at Kauffman Stadium. Whenever I think of Kauffman Stadium, I think of the days when KC wasn't good and the stands had as many Twins fans as Royals fans. Then, KC became a baseball powerhouse, sort of like the guy who was turned into a newt and got better. For a bit, it looked like KC was turning back into a newt, and their record indicates this may be so. However, the last time Twins played KC...oh wait, that's in the past and we shall refrain from looking back. Forward, ever forward. Currently, the Twins have almost the opposite record of KC: Twins are 48 and 25 while KC is 25 and 49. With that, some things to think about: Pitching for the Twins: Jake Odorizzi Pitching for KC: Glenn Sparkman Play Ball!

they play football over there and have no idea what this strange arcane American sport is all about...

Kepler"

You're gonna do the trade deadline thread, right?

Gibson made it through the fourth! Though, to be honest, not like the Twins really had any other option.

Bakers Square: The used to have an incredible chicken pot pie. Mmmm.

That contract Kepler signed in the off-season is looking like a bargain right about now.

I still want to know why the 3rd base coach didn't notice the 3rd base getting in behind Garver.

Are you sure your "ice cream" isn't labeled "Seagrams?"

Nice try. I may be a sucker but I'm not falling for that again.

Sounds like you have prior experience with this kind of thing.

Unreal. His guys got an exceptionally generous strike zone and he's going nuts? Idiot.

Did Cora go off on the umps? Because his pitchers were getting some awfully generous calls when it came to the strike zone.

It was fun. Well, the win in the end was fun. The blood pressure spikes were not.

Well, if I head to bed now, I might get an hour of sleep before the next game starts...

Yes.

fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, call me a sucker...

More than likely.

Pfft I typed it on TD before the so-called "pro's" mentioned it. Pikers.

*Insert image of Darth and Luke here*