Blake

I notice the Royals seem to be able to hit to all fields. Seems like there should be a lesson there for a certain member of the Twins.

Isn't she heir to the Whurlitzer Juke Box fortune?

Nah, some other team that has a clue will turn May into an ace pitcher.

Here's to small victories!

I caught the video of Allen talking to May. I'm imagining the conversation went something like this: Allen: What the bleepity bleep bleep was that? May: What? Allen; Because you bleeping bleep bleep bleepity aren't bleeping bleep bleep getting the job done, you're bleeping bleep going down, son. May: Huh? Allen: You're bleepity bleeping bleep bet your bleepity you're gone to bleeping AAA tomorrow.

This is where we need Tim Laudner catching. He'd call for the same pitch in the same location. * *for those scoring at home, Cain fouled an inside fastball off his knee. Cain managed to eventually get up.

I told my wife the game would be finished tonight so as to avoid prolonging the agony.

Note, however, it was in a non-standard format. Not sure if I lose style points for that.

You forgot the platypus. Platypuses (platypie?) are important for post 4,000.

There's a song for every occasion:

Hey, anyone notice? It's been at least 15 minutes since the Royals scored! Rain delay? What rain delay....?

You get the standard answer: Yes.

I'm guessing you watch A LOT of Food Channel.

Ask and ye shall receive:

Speaking of joyless: Casey at the Bat Ernest Lawrence Thayer The outlook wasn’t brilliant for the Mudville nine that day: The score stood four to two, with but one inning more to play, And then when Cooney died at first, and Barrows did the same, A pall-like silence fell upon the patrons of the game. A straggling few got up to go in deep despair. The rest Clung to the hope which springs eternal in the human breast; They thought, “If only Casey could but get a whack at that— We’d put up even money now, with Casey at the bat.” But Flynn preceded Casey, as did also Jimmy Blake, And the former was a hoodoo, while the latter was a cake; So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat, For there seemed but little chance of Casey getting to the bat. But Flynn let drive a single, to the wonderment of all, And Blake, the much despisèd, tore the cover off the ball; And when the dust had lifted, and men saw what had occurred, There was Jimmy safe at second and Flynn a-hugging third. Then from five thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell; It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell; It pounded on the mountain and recoiled upon the flat, For Casey, mighty Casey, was advancing to the bat. There was ease in Casey’s manner as he stepped into his place; There was pride in Casey’s bearing and a smile lit Casey’s face. And when, responding to the cheers, he lightly doffed his hat, No stranger in the crowd could doubt ‘twas Casey at the bat. Ten thousand eyes were on him as he rubbed his hands with dirt; Five thousand tongues applauded when he wiped them on his shirt; Then while the writhing pitcher ground the ball into his hip, Defiance flashed in Casey’s eye, a sneer curled Casey’s lip. And now the leather-covered sphere came hurtling through the air, And Casey stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there. Close by the sturdy batsman the ball unheeded sped— “That ain’t my style," said Casey. “Strike one!” the umpire said. From the benches, black with people, there went up a muffled roar, Like the beating of the storm-waves on a stern and distant shore; “Kill him! Kill the umpire!” shouted someone on the stand; And it’s likely they’d have killed him had not Casey raised his hand. With a smile of Christian charity great Casey’s visage shone; He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on; He signaled to the pitcher, and once more the dun sphere flew; But Casey still ignored it and the umpire said, “Strike two!” “Fraud!” cried the maddened thousands, and echo answered “Fraud!” But one scornful look from Casey and the audience was awed. They saw his face grow stern and cold, they saw his muscles strain, And they knew that Casey wouldn’t let that ball go by again. The sneer is gone from Casey’s lip, his teeth are clenched in hate, He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate; And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go, And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey’s blow. Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright, The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light; And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout, But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.

These days, loss leaders require a subsidy.

No, but please fill me in, as you seem to be rather knowledgeable when it comes to such creatures.

Did you try Uber?

if VJ's hasn't been on "Diners, Drive-ins and Dives" it doesn't exist.

What, no head injury this time?

Glad I'm not the only one that thought "The Bachelor" viewing was weird.

With every purchase of a Twins game package?

Now that I've pressure washed the grill and then washed the grill off me, I checked in to see just how bad the carnage is. Much to my surprise, the Twins are still in it.

Good grief. Is Phil an MLB pitcher or is Hughes throwing BP? DL or DFA Phil. Those are the choices at this point. I'm off to pressure wash.

I think the Twins fear the Jays.