
Twins Video
1. Detroit Lakes – In the French language… Detroit means strait. In the English language… a strait is defined as a narrow passage of water connecting two large bodies of water. Yet another example of the French moving about our country and naming cities something nonsensical as a practical joke. Detroit Lakes is the Red Stick (Baton Rouge) of the North and the French are still laughing at us today. The latest census lists the population as 8,569 but during the summer months (as a result of tourism) the population swells to 8,585 and 10 of those extra tourists are simply showing up yearly to search for the strait.
2. Our Twins – Buyer mode has begun. Jaime Garcia is supposedly on his way to Minnesota. My wife and I have been married 27 years today. I was already planning on giving my wife a Jaime tonight. Now I’ll have to think of something else.
3. The Tigers – Seller mode has begun. J.D. Martinez has been traded to Arizona and rumors are swirling that Verlander, Wilson, Avila and maybe more are soon to follow. If Avila is traded… that will be Dad trading his son. Umm… Son… I’ve traded you to the Minnesota Twins… go see the traveling secretary and remember to call Mom.
4. Today’s Joe M Conversation:
Mauer: Joe!!! Are you OK?
Maddon: Joe!!! It’s me Joe… can you hear me?
Mauer: This isn’t good… he just slumped over… what should we do?
Maddon: How should I know? Joe… are you OK?
Mauer: I’m calling 911
Montana: 911… what’s your emergency?
Mauer: Joe is that you? Why are you answering my 911 call?
Montana: I work here a couple of days a week. I find that it relaxes me.
Mauer: Listen… we haven’t got time… McCarthy just fell over.
Maddon: I think he’s dead… yep, he’s dead.
Mauer: He’s dead, Joe… do something… what do we do?
Montana: Ok… we are going to take this in steps... are you ready?
Mauer: What do we do? Tell me what to do?
Montana: Step one… you got to make sure that he is deceased.
Mauer: OK… hold on.
Montana: Joe… Joe… wait. (LOUD BANG)
Mauer: OK… he’s dead for sure now.
Montana: You shot him?
Mauer: Yep…. what do we do next? I'm ready for step two?
5. Foul Balls – I was watching a foul ball in flight. I noticed that the baseball seemed to get bigger and bigger the closer it got to me. I was wondering why that was…. was this a simple matter of physics? Of perspective? And then it hit me.
____________________
Lineups:
TIGERS
Ian Kinsler 2B
Alex Avila C
Justin Upton LF
Miguel Cabrera 1B
Nick Castellanos 3B
Victor Martinez DH
Mikie Mahtook CF
Alex Presley RF
Jose Iglesias SS
Anibel Sanchez P
TWINS
Brian Dozier 2B
Zack Granite CF
Joe Mauer 1B
Miguel Sano 3B
Max Kepler RF
Robbie Grossman DH
Eddie Rosario LF
Ehire Adrianza SS
Jason Castro C
Ervin Santana P
Weather: mostly cloudy, 77 deg, 15% chance of rain.
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