TK really knows where his paycheck comes from.

 

Tonight I wish the Twins batters were as clear about this.

Ok...

 

0 Runs

1 Hit

 

But.. Only 2 strikeouts...

 

Strangely I'm happy with that.

Scott Kazmir, wasn't he pitching in a mixed slo-pitch league last year?

What about Merle Haggard?

 

Merle Haggard is from Oklahoma and he helped create the Bakersfield Sound.

 

The Band KORN is from Bakersfield and if they were from Oklahoma... They would know how to spell Corn.

That was stupid baserunning right? Or genius. I can't tell.

Nice hustle by Florimon.

Ok...

 

0 Runs

1 Hit

 

But.. Only 2 strikeouts...

 

Strangely I'm happy with that.

 

This season we have all had to lower the threshold for what makes us happy.

That was stupid baserunning right? Or genius. I can't tell.

 

Its absolutely stupid... Until it works.

...and that's why it matters who you stick in the 2 hole.

 

Plouffe got totally lucky on that doinker.

An outfielder catches that ball.

Nice running by Dozier. I think we can all be happy with the Twins tying the game.

Scott Kazmir, wasn't he pitching in a mixed slo-pitch league last year?

 

They cut him when Coomer took him deep 3 times in the first inning.

PLOUFFE... or should I type STUBBS

Ok...

 

0 Runs

1 Hit

 

But.. Only 2 strikeouts...

 

Strangely I'm happy with that.

 

And now 2 runs and 2 hits, but an additional strikeout. Mixed feelings?

Plouffe got totally lucky on that doinker.

 

Not sure why you're calling Kazmir a doinker or what it means but stop it.

I had to run that through the translator... It came out as:

 

You Empty-headed animal Chief... Riverbrian farts in your General Direction. Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries.

 

Close enough for French Canadian!

And now 2 runs and 2 hits, but an additional strikeout. Mixed feelings?

 

I'm doing OK... If we keep the K's below 23 tonight... I'm gonna be alright.

Current Morneau trade value update...one chocolate bar that was left in your car on a 100 degree day.

Not sure why you're calling Kazmir a doinker or what it means but stop it.

 

Thank God... You clarified that... I wasn't sure what a Doinker was... And I wasn't sure what a Plouffe was either.

Current Morneau trade value update...one chocolate bar that was left in your car on a 100 degree day.

 

So you're telling me ... THERE'S A CHANCE!

Current Morneau trade value update...one chocolate bar that was left in your car on a 100 degree day.

 

Ok... Raise your hand... How many of us have taken that melted chocolate bar and tried to eat it anyway?

 

Licking the melted chocolate from the little creases and folds and getting more on your face and hands in the process.

Welcome back, Burton.

En peu de français est trop français.

 

Sorry, I'm still learning American, it's confusing I'll admit.

from the little creases and folds and getting more on your face and hands in the process.

 

Wait, we're still talking about the chocolate bar, right?

Ok... Raise your hand... How many of us have taken that melted chocolate bar and tried to eat it anyway?

 

Licking the melted chocolate from the little creases and folds and getting more on your face and hands in the process.

 

Not if I'm wearing lipst- I mean, not if we're talking almonds.

That was the wildest pitch I've seen in awhile.

Chris Colabello... You gotta protect Son...

Chris Colabello... You gotta protect Son...

 

Son? He's older than any of my kids, at least.

Merle Haggard is from Oklahoma and he helped create the Bakersfield Sound.

 

The Band KORN is from Bakersfield and if they were from Oklahoma... They would know how to spell Corn.

Are you sure about that?

 

I thought Bakersfield was created because god wanted to balance out the southern half of California - too many liberals, too much glitz, glamour, and fun in the sun.

 

God created Bakersfield in the image of Oklahoma and planted a plethora of Meth Crops and created the Bakersfield man and woman in the image of the stereotypical Oklahoman.

 

That is how my bible reads.

 

Disclaimer: I am the author of my bible

The official scorer can't save you this time, Cletus.