I would tell a couple chemistry jokes, but I'd probably get no reaction.

I had a calculus joke lined up, but it was derivative.

SOOOOOO...I don't get it.  

 

Mrs Chief sent me to the store for a loaf of bread, and told me "and if they have eggs, get a dozen."

 

So I came home and she opened up the bag, and groaned.  "Why can't you listen to me?  There's a dozen loaves of bread!"  She's been pouting all night.

 

I don't get it.  The store had eggs.

Dang Buxton, don't lose your confidence at the plate. Trying too hard with those bunt attempts.  Slow it down, Buck! 

Does your wife hit with power, too?

Attaboy Buck!

I want ice cream. I don't have any. And I don't have yogurt, either, which I sometimes use when I have an ice cream craving.

 

Does your wife hit with power, too?

No worse than Ben Revere

 

I want ice cream. I don't have any. And I don't have yogurt, either, which I sometimes use when I have an ice cream craving.

that's it.  I'm off to the freezer for some Schwan's vanilla, with caramel slathered over the top.  10, 15 scoops.

 

I had a calculus joke lined up, but it was derivative.

 

Sounds like a partial excuse to me.

 

 

http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really.gif

that's it.  I'm off to the freezer for some Schwan's vanilla, with caramel slathered over the top.  10, 15 scoops.

You are a horrible person!

 

Okay ... running to the convenience mart downstairs for a dark chocolate Dove bar!

Boy does Pelfrey work slow. Don't miss that (or any other part of his game, really).

Uh oh, don't tell Chief, but the Sox announcers are talking about Verlander and the waiver deadline and how it might be his last game in a Tiger's uniform tomorrow ...

If Esco hits a double I think Buck beats Mauer home.

Boy does Pelfrey work slow. Don't miss that (or any other part of his game, really).

Yeah, waiting for this inning to be over before running to the mart downstairs ... it might be closed by then.

You know what's the downside to having Mauer bat 2nd and Buxton 3rd?

 

We're looking at it right now.

If Esco hits a double I think Buck beats Mauer home.

if it were Vargas on base ahead of him, I think Buck could beat him home twice.

Awww man ... BAD CALL!

 

You know what's the downside to having Mauer bat 2nd and Buxton 3rd?

 

We're looking at it right now.

1st and 2nd, one out, cleanup hitter up?

 

Doesn't seem so bad.

Watching Pelfrey pitch an inning is just kinda painful. Takes waaay too long in between pitches and add the fact that he's not very good, and you have innings that last 12 minutes on average.

 

I had a calculus joke lined up, but it was derivative.

 

Trying to make a trig joke, but i have no angle to one and am not receiving any helpful sines from above.  So I guess I'll just go off on a baseball tangent instead.

 

*sees self out*

Very glad the Twins Mike Pelfrey Era is over.

11 Ks so far for Berrios! Nice stuff!

1st and 2nd, one out, cleanup hitter up?

 

Doesn't seem so bad.

Just made me itchy watching Buxton taking his lead at first base, knowing it would take a triple to score him.

Bravo, Jose. Bravo

 

Very glad the Twins Mike Pelfrey Era is over.

 

What if he pitches to them again this inning?

Big Game Berrios

If I hear "all those strikeouts run up the pitch count" one more time, I'm going to...going to...well, I shall be very put out.

 

You know what runs up pitch counts?

 

Pitch to contact.

Berrios tonight...

 

ROSIE!!!!!

 

And what is out there? That ball didn't even bounce.