June 29, 201610 yr Sven was going for his morning walk one day when he went past Ole's house and saw a sign that said "Boat For Sale." This confused Sven because he knew that Ole didn't own a boat. So he finally decided to go in and ask Ole about it. "Hey Ole," said Sven, "I noticed da sign in your yard dat says 'Boat For Sale,' but all ya have in the yard is your old John Deere tractor and combine." Ole replied, "Ya, and dey're boat for sale."
June 29, 201610 yr Seems as if grossman is regressing to the mean, eh?seems like we got about all we could ask for outta him
June 29, 201610 yr Sven takes Lena to a nice restaurant for their anniversary. As the waitress brings Sven the bill, she asks him, with a grin on her face, "Do you know the difference between a canoe and a Norwegian?" Sven gets a big grin on his face, waiting for the punchline..."Vell, no, young lady. Vhat's da diff'rence?" "Canoes sometimes tip," she replies as she walks away.
June 29, 201610 yr Ole bought Lena a piano for her birthday.A few weeks later, Lars inquired how she was doing with it."Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to svitch to a clarinet.""How come?" asked Lars."Vell," Ole answered, "because vith a clarinet, she can't sing."
June 29, 201610 yr Trade him now. I just got off the phone with the Dodgers GM. Dozier for Kershaw is a no-go, I'm afraid. I'll keep trying, though. Edited June 29, 201610 yr by Dozier's Glorious Hair
June 29, 201610 yr Kinda awkward for a reporter to be talking about what you're going to be doing at AAA when you're literally up to bat in the majors
June 29, 201610 yr Silly Sally went into town to her favorite store. She walked by and noticed a sign in the window that said "felt 25 cents". Silly Sally laughed and laughed. She knew she could get felt for free
June 29, 201610 yr I just got off the phone with the Dodgers GM. Dozier for Kershaw is a no-go, I'm afraid. I'll keep trying, though. Maybe if they throw in Seager?
June 29, 201610 yr I just got off the phone with the Dodgers GM. Dozier for Kershaw is a no-go, I'm afraid. I'll keep trying, though. You shoulda tried harder.
June 29, 201610 yr I just got off the phone with the Dodgers GM. Dozier for Kershaw is a no-go, I'm afraid. I'll keep trying, though. ****, where's Duensing when you need him?
June 29, 201610 yr I just got off the phone with the Dodgers GM. Dozier for Kershaw is a no-go, I'm afraid. I'll keep trying, though. Kershaw actually hurt his back in his last start. Nothing serious, but Terry still turned down the offer, not wanting to trade for an injured guy
June 29, 201610 yr I just got off the phone with the Dodgers GM. Dozier for Kershaw is a no-go, I'm afraid. I'll keep trying, though. Ole says not to vorry, ve'll settle fer Kershaw and Pederson. / oy, scooped by Chief again / / and he twists the knife with a Pity Like/ / / and den takes it avay, dontchaknow
June 29, 201610 yr That's going to be a fun story to tell future kids/grand kids one day about land lines... Believe it or not little Tommy, there was a time when we didn't have hand-held computers in our possession at all times. We used to have to call people at their house to see if they were home and available to play backyard baseball that afternoon.my child is two and has never lived in or visited a house with a land line but if you hand her the old toy https://www.google.com/search?q=vintage+toy+telephone&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&hl=en-us&client=safari#imgrc=WAvkzwoh4-FUBM%3A She knows exactly what to do with it. On the other hand she taps and swipes my tv like it's an iPad
June 29, 201610 yr I haven't seen such disappointing auction results since one of the sororities at my college tried to sell a date with me.
June 29, 201610 yr Question: Ortiz leads MLB with 31 doubles. Is it because he plays in Fenway or is he just an awesome hitter? Amazing...I would think a guy like Mauer would be in that category versus Ortiz. I don't think Ortiz has hit a ball to left field in 15+ years. They shift the entire defense on him every at bat.
June 29, 201610 yr ****, where's Duensing when you need him? The Dodgers actually really like Fien. I knew we shouldn't have given up on him.
June 29, 201610 yr It amazes me that there aren't more stolen bases against us every single game. If I were an opposing team and Suzuki is catching, I'm sending the guy on first every time unless its Ortiz or Panda or someone like that.
June 29, 201610 yr You all know me...I kinda enjoy telling a joke now and then. I'm reminded of the time I was up north fishing and stopped in at a small tavern to have a cold one up there by the Falls. I ordered, and a big, burly bartender brought my beer. "Hey," I said, "wanna hear a Sven and Ole joke?" "Vell, go ahead if you vant," he said. "But you should know, I'm Norwegian. So's that big feller down dere at de end of da bar. And dat bigger lady down dere at de udder end of da bar." I thought about it, and said, "You're right friend. That's probably not a great idea. I'd have to explain the damn thing three times."
June 29, 201610 yr I think one of these MLB players need to bring back stirrups. They could be kind of a Payne Stewart type of guy...
June 29, 201610 yr They could be kind of a Payne Stewart type of guy...Oof, let's hope that doesn't happen
June 29, 201610 yr Holy moly our starters have thrown 15 innings in 2 games! That was like 3 1/2 games worth for 95% of the season!
June 29, 201610 yr Question: Ortiz leads MLB with 31 doubles. Is it because he plays in Fenway or is he just an awesome hitter? Amazing...I would think a guy like Mauer would be in that category versus Ortiz. I don't think Ortiz has hit a ball to left field in 15+ years. They shift the entire defense on him every at bat.Most teams actually play a more extreme shift against Mauer than Ortiz.
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