The Twins will try to close out June with a win tonight. The pitching probables are Phil Hughes (6-6, 4.20) versus Anthony DeSclafani (5-5, 3.35), both righties. Game starts at 6.

 

Weather forecast: Summerlike, good chance of scattered t-storms.

 

Lineups TBA.

 

Note: With the Twins in a swoon, we will go light on baseball in this set up and instead celebrate the "Mid Season Game Thread Awards" in this post. This will attempt to pull some of the best of the best from the game threads from the season up to this point. Some posters may see their names (fake names) below. Read on...

 

A couple quick things to think about:

 

1. Ever noticed how TD Posters only use their dogs as avatars? Yeah me too. Anyone who has the guts to use a picture of your cat as your avatar, please come forward! I will also accept your parakeet, gerbil, or komodo dragon. But don't put those all in the same cage, please. 

 

2. Oh right—baseball. Despite last night's lopsided result, the Reds and the Twins are actually pretty similar teams this season. Both teams have a functional starting rotation, but with an underwhelming bullpen light on strikeouts, that is backed up by an All Star closer. Both teams have concerns at catcher and short stop. Both have an MVP first baseman who nonetheless has drawn the ire of the fan base for not hitting for power. Even the Reds outfield can be scary at times, though not as scary as the Twins and definitely not as scary as the Reds outfield back in 1998, when they played a handful of games with Dmitri Young in left field, rookie Mike Frank in center, and utility man Chris Stynes in right. Wouldn't that outfield scare you? (Hint: if you are still not scared, try just saying their last names, left to right.)

 

3. The number three thing to think about tonight is that there are only two things to think about. So let's get right to the Game Thread balloting!

 

   --------------------

 

The AWARDS

 

CATEGORY: Best Riverbrian-ism

 

THE NOMINEES: *

1. When watching the Twins, I had a last four years flashback, but it was four years ago and in real time.
2. Never lick a stranger in the face without explaining why.
3. The dentist gave me some gum to chew, to remove the bacteria from my teeth, but when I thought of all that bacteria in my gum, I spit it out.
4. WRITE IN: _____________________

* write in votes are encouraged, for which single individual can keep track of every crazy thing he says?

 

   --------------------

 

CATEGORY: Best Game Thread-as-literary device

 

THE NOMINEES:

1. The Short Story (ashburyjohn)
2. The Haiku (sampleSizeOfOne)
3. The 475,000-word epic novel (always33) *
4. The History Lesson (ChiTownTwinsFan)
5. The Bob Uecker book review (Blake)

* at least it was a novel about baseball  

 

   --------------------

 

CATEGORY: Best Recurring Game Thread Meme

 

THE NOMINEES:

1. The Pre-game Science Update (CRArko)
2. The Rally Avatar (Bark's Lounge) *
3. The Nature Update (JB_Iowa)
4. Grandpa Simpson (ashburyjohn)
5. The Winner's Dance (twinsnorth49) 
6. CBU: The Circus Boy Update

* note: voting for all rally avatar nominees is temporarily closed, to include the rally roger, Olsen Twins, bounce back bunny, or any other

 

   --------------------

 

CATEGORY: Best Pet Animal Avatar on Twins Daily

 

THE NOMINEES:

1. Dog
2. Cat
3. Rally Monkey

   --------------------

 

CATEGORY: Best Frankenstein *

 

THE NOMINEES:

1. Boris Karloff
2. Fred Gwynne
3. Marty Feldman

* yeah I know Frankenstein was actually the name of the scientist not the monster. All copyrights etc etc.

 

 

   --------------------

 

This concludes the mid season Game thread ballot. Vote up to 35 times. Original poster reserves the right to throw out up to 60 million votes if any other one poster appears to be dominating the voting.

 

TERMS AND CONDITIONS: Votes shall be certified by the Original Poster only (me). All disputes resolved by the Original Poster. All decisions final. However, let it be known that Original Poster at all times reserves the right to change mind about any subject as additional information or facts come to the fore regarding that subject, here on this thread or any other, now or in the future. 

 

One last term and condition: Enjoy the game!

 

 

 

Write-in for the best game thread of the year: 

 

The #ASGWorthy Game Thread Balloting (Hosken Bombo Disco)

How's a gorilla for ya?

 

Oh, by the way, Happy Asteroid Day!

 

http://www.planetary.org/blogs/bruce-betts/2015/0630-5-steps-to-preventing-asteroid-impact.html

 

 

 

 

CATEGORY: Best Frankenstein *

 

THE NOMINEES:

1. Boris Karloff
2. Fred Gwynne
3. Marty Feldman

* yeah I know Frankenstein was actually the name of the scientist not the monster. All copyrights etc etc.

 

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 1.10.02 PM.png

 

   --------------------

 

 

 

 

Write in candidate Glenn Strange:

 

And while you put in Marty Feldman, I think you meant Peter Boyle:

 

 

And while you put in Marty Feldman, I think you meant Peter Boyle:

 

boyle.jpg

Concur.

 

Feldman is the Igor. Pratchett has a good take on Igors in general.

I vote for the Kansas City Royals

 

Concur.

Feldman is the Igor. Pratchett has a good take on Igors in general.

. . . and don't forget, it's pronounced "Eye-Gor"

 

I vote for the Kansas City Royals

So it was YOU?

 

I vote for the Kansas City Royals

I'm sorry.  This vote cannot be processed at this time.  Please try again at a later time and with a different answer.

Edited June 30, 201511 yr by James

Lineups available at mlb.com.  Sugar Shane in left for Flyball Phil. 

How's a gorilla for ya?

 

Oh, by the way, Happy Asteroid Day!

 

http://www.planetary.org/blogs/bruce-betts/2015/0630-5-steps-to-preventing-asteroid-impact.html

CRArko, you really got a gorilla?!

 

Cool!

 

I guess i do have a tuba, though a closer look at the cover of the children's book shows it to be inconsistent with mine.

 

Funny story: i did get a tuba off of craigslist which had been mounted on the wall for many years apparently, and it had a sock and a little nerf ball in it. I disposed of the sock, i think, but have gotten good use of that ball!

 

Asteroid day sound's pretty cool. I'll start wishing other people a happy one, if that's okay...

 

Oh, and CBU: Pre-game Science 1, CBU 0...

 

CRArko, you really got a gorilla?!

Cool!

I guess i do have a tuba, though a closer look at the cover of the children's book shows it to be inconsistent with mine.

Funny story: i did get a tuba off of craigslist which had been mounted on the wall for many years apparently, and it had a sock and a little nerf ball in it. I disposed of the sock, i think, but have gotten good use of that ball!

Asteroid day sound's pretty cool. I'll start wishing other people a happy one, if that's okay...

Oh, and CBU: Pre-game Science 1, CBU 0...

No, I really AM a gorilla. Ook, ook, bwahahaha!

 

P.S. can you tell that two weeks of online training is driving me apesh** crazy?

Edited June 30, 201511 yr by CRArko

No, I really AM a gorilla. Ook, ook, bwahahaha!

That's even cooler!

 

That's even cooler!

Shabani's story: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3139679/Meet-Shabani-handsome-gorilla-raised-Australia-fame-Japan-women-flock-zoo-just-him.html

 

Since I get all these ads here telling me about (very young) Asian women I should date it seemed appropriate.

But my pet beats them all.

 

Edited June 30, 201511 yr by always33

 

 

 

CATEGORY: Best Frankenstein *

 

THE NOMINEES:

1. Boris Karloff
2. Fred Gwynne
3. Marty Feldman

* yeah I know Frankenstein was actually the name of the scientist not the monster. All copyrights etc etc.

 

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 1.10.02 PM.png

 

 

 Was hoping we'd seen the last of the Brewers for a while.  Why ya gotta post a pic of Ryan Braun (next to Fred Gwynne)?

LaVelle E. Neal III ‏@LaVelleNeal  · 18m18 minutes ago 
Reds finish batting practice just as the rain starts to fall. Guess who doesn't get b.p. today? Your guys....

But my pet beats them all.

One pet to rule them all,

One pet to find them.

One pet to bring them all,

And in the darkness bind them.

 

In the land of Cincinnati, where the rain clouds lie.

One pet to rule them all,

One pet to find them.

One pet to bring them all,

And in the darkness bind them.

 

In the land of Cincinnati, where the rain clouds lie.

Isn't there a song about a cockroach that ate Cincinnati?

 

I vaguely remember it from a Dr. Demento collection, i think.

 

That said, i highly approve of the house centipede.

 

. . . and don't forget, it's pronounced "Eye-Gor"

 

Good call Froderick.

LaVelle E. Neal III ‏@LaVelleNeal  · 18m18 minutes ago 

Reds finish batting practice just as the rain starts to fall. Guess who doesn't get b.p. today? Your guys....

To paraphrase the little statement over CRArko's avatar:

 

"Don't need no stinkin batting practice!"

 

Any idea/guesstimate how long?

 

And as it hasn't found its way up here:

 

Minnesota Twins

 

1. Brian Dozier {R} 2B

2. Torii Hunter {R} RF

3. Joe Mauer {L} 1B

4. Trevor Plouffe {R} 3B

5. Eddie Rosario {L} LF

6. Eduardo Nunez {R} SS

7. Kurt Suzuki {R} C

8. Danny Santana {R} CF

9. Phil Hughes {R} P

 

Cincinnati Reds

 

1. Billy Hamilton {S} CF

2. Ivan De Jesus {R} 2B

3. Joey Votto {L} 1B

4. Todd Frazier {R} 3B

5. Jay Bruce {L} RF

6. Marlon Byrd {R} LF

7. Tucker Barnhart {S} C

8. Eugenio Suarez {R} SS

9. Anthony DeSclafani {R} P

 

I'll take a pass on saying any one Riverbrian-isms is better than another.

 

I think i vote for the short story thread intro...

 

The pregrame science are more thought provoking, but the post game dances are um, well, something.

 

And being a fan of Young Frankenstein, i gotta go with Boyle.

 

What other decisions do i have to avoid?

LaVelle E. Neal III ‏@LaVelleNeal  · 34m34 minutes ago 
The feeling is that we will have delay (s) but get the game in. Prepare for a long night.

LaVelle E. Neal III ‏@LaVelleNeal  · 34m34 minutes ago 

The feeling is that we will have delay (s) but get the game in. Prepare for a long night.

Thanks!

 

That said, i highly approve of the house centipede.

I should have clarified that this is not the only centipede in my household. In fact, we have quite the breeding facility set up now. It all started about ten years ago when a little one wandered into our home and we took pity, rescued it, and transported it to a more suitable environment out of doors. It went and told all it's centipede friends ... "When lost, go to always33's family and they'll find you a good home."

 

Eventually we had so many callers that we were forced to extend our hospitality and let them lodge for the night. That of course produced little centipedes who insisted that they should be allowed to continue life in their place of birth and raise little centipedes of their own, and the trend continues to this day.

 

Besides centipedes, our house provides room and board for carpenter ants and spiders. I was forced to put my foot down when it came to creatures with wings, however, so our walls are adorned with elegantly pressed mosquitos and flies. The moths and parakeets we capture and mercifully release outside.

Mike Berardino ‏@MikeBerardino  · 9m9 minutes ago 
#Reds don't expect tonight's game to start on time. Next update in 45 minutes or so.

So one more entry in the Frankenstein contest; this one is pretty obscure, and I doubt most of you have heard of this film. It was actually pretty good; not quite as faithful to Shelley as it claims, but still good.

 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frankenstein:_The_True_Story

 

Michael Sarrazin.

Those are the lineups---I had some trouble getting on to edit. Thanks for your help SS.

 

You are right JB. The radar looks dry at the moment, but there is a pretty nasty cell bearing down on them in the next 10-20 minutes. As long as that thing keeps moving it sounds like it will be mostly clear after that. 

 

Your CBU

 

I'm home early, waiting for an estimator to show up so my wife and I can part with a good chunk of change to replace a badly poured concrete patio. The added bonus is being home in time to catch the game from the beginning. So, no more talk of this rain stuff.

 

However, since the estimator doesn't seem to think it's necessary to show up, we'll probably go with the first and only quote.

 

I cannot believe how flaky contractors are these days, considering business isn't all that good. 

 

 

 

So one more entry in the Frankenstein contest; this one is pretty obscure, and I doubt most of you have heard of this film. It was actually pretty good; not quite as faithful to Shelley as it claims, but still good.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frankenstein:_The_True_Story

Michael Sarrazin.image.jpg

 

Something about that image screams Kubrick / Nicholson / the Stanley Hotel