Game Thread: Twins @ Astros 7:10pm cdt 8/23/2022 ad

[sampleSizeOfOne]

8 minutes ago, USAFChief said:

I think Rocco gets a suspension for not vacating the field after getting ejected.

Probably, but i'm still in disbelief of suspension. I think that whole argument could have happened when he was charged for a mound visit, and if he lost it then, he could actually make use of the visit, and perhaps not be ejected, or end Sanchez' night prematurely.

[Tlaker]

2 minutes ago, Hosken Bombo Disco said:

I did my 3 and a half minutes, and ran out of material 

My wife says that about my ability in the bedzzzzzzz zz , sorry nodded off

[ashbury]

9 minutes ago, USAFChief said:

Yeah you're probably right.

So I won't do the "Did you read the book about JFK and Abe Lincoln? Mind-blowing!" joke.

I feel ya.  The last time I told my Squeaky Fromme joke, it missed the mark.

[USAFChief]

8 minutes ago, Hosken Bombo Disco said:

I did my 3 and a half minutes, and ran out of material 

Rookie.

I do an entire game thread with NO material. 

[AceWrigley]

3 minutes ago, ashbury said:

I feel ya.  The last time I told my Squeaky Fromme joke, it missed the mark.

She just had a thing against Fords.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Just now, USAFChief said:

Rookie.

I do an entire game thread with NO material. 

That's immaterial...

[Aggies7]

We’re going to have new hitting coaches next year, right? Right?

[ashbury]

1 minute ago, USAFChief said:

Rookie.

I do an entire game thread with NO material. 

Or shame.

[AceWrigley]

Just now, Aggies7 said:

We’re going to have new hitting coaches next year, right? Right?

We have hitting coaches?

[ashbury]

I tuned in late and just assumed the game hasn't started yet.

[USAFChief]

So, I'm tryna decide. Would it be more surprising if the Twins DO get no hitted, or don't?

 

[Hosken Bombo Disco]

And a reverent hush settles over the game thread, as Justin Verlander puts down the Twins in order, yet again

[Winston Smith]

11 minutes ago, Tlaker said:

I love when the game thread turns into open mic at Funny Bone!

Keeps me more entertained than the game

Lately it's been watch the game or paint dry. So it's nice to have a third option.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

1 minute ago, AceWrigley said:

She just had a thing against Fords.

A Chevy person?

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Celestino is in center now?

[Hosken Bombo Disco]

Channeling Mitch Hedberg: 

I do not order chicken fingers because I think it’s cruel to cut off their little fingers and serve them as food. Give me your meat instead, little chicken. 

Sure, your hands may now be clean, but the part where you touched the soap dispenser remains dirty.

(helps if you read in Mitch Hedberg’s voice)

[ashbury]

Astros having a terrible game at the plate, with only 2 runs to show for it and a cumulative 15 LOB after only 5 innings.  Can't anyone hit with men on base?

[Danchat]

3 minutes ago, Aggies7 said:

We’re going to have new hitting coaches next year, right? Right?

Well, we just fired our hitting coach last year and got a new one. I don't know if firing them annually is going to work, though what we're doing now sure isn't either.

[USAFChief]

3 minutes ago, Hosken Bombo Disco said:

And a reverent hush settles over the game thread, as Justin Verlander puts down the Twins in order, yet again

AKA "observing a moment of silence."

[Aggies7]

3 minutes ago, Hosken Bombo Disco said:

Channeling Mitch Hedberg: 

I do not order chicken fingers because I think it’s cruel to cut off their little fingers and serve them as food. Give me your meat instead, little chicken. 

Sure, your hands may now be clean, but the part where you touched the soap dispenser remains dirty.

(helps if you read in Mitch Hedberg’s voice)

I like to order the club sandwich. I’m not even a member, man, I don’t know how I get away with it!

[USAFChief]

7 minutes ago, ashbury said:

Or shame.

 

[Winston Smith]

3 minutes ago, ashbury said:

Astros having a terrible game at the plate, with only 2 runs to show for it and a cumulative 15 LOB after only 5 innings.  Can't anyone hit with men on base?

If the Twins can get anybody on base we'll find out.

[AceWrigley]

I had to visit the throne room . . . a very moving experience.

[Hosken Bombo Disco]

2 minutes ago, Aggies7 said:

I like to order the club sandwich. I’m not even a member, man, I don’t know how I get away with it!

Had an awesome delivery—when he wasn’t too far in the tank. 

mine were originals by the way  

[USAFChief]

2 minutes ago, Winston Smith said:

If the Twins can get anybody on base we'll find out.

Hey, we've had base runner this game!

[D. Hocking]

7 minutes ago, sampleSizeOfOne said:

A Chevy person?

Did SNL ever do a Chevy as Ford - Squeaky Fromme sketch?

I am guessing Buckwheat getting shot the same way Reagan did would not fly now.

[ashbury]

7 minutes ago, Hosken Bombo Disco said:

Channeling Mitch Hedberg: 

I do not order chicken fingers because I think it’s cruel to cut off their little fingers and serve them as food. Give me your meat instead, little chicken. 

Sure, your hands may now be clean, but the part where you touched the soap dispenser remains dirty.

(helps if you read in Mitch Hedberg’s voice)

My friend said, “You know what I like? Home runs and triple plays.” I was like, “Dude, you gotta give me time to guess.”

[Aggies7]

Yay.

[sampleSizeOfOne]

Correa!

[notoriousgod71]

Modern day baseball is just unwatchable.