'Little Big League' Twins vs. 'Major League' Indians: Play Ball

[Nick Nelson]

Our hope was to be watching a division race between the Twins and Indians unfolding in earnest right now.

 

We're not, so instead I have dictated this fictional contest between the Twins team from the movie Little Big League (1994) and the Indians team from Major League (1989), as called by radio play-by-play man Wally Holland (John Gordon's character in LBL).

 

This is either my greatest or dumbest idea yet. Likely both.First a few notes. Yes, I re-watched both films and meticulously scouted all the players in preparation for writing this. If you're at all a fan of either classic baseball flick, I think you'll enjoy. There are some liberties taken with timelines, but the idea is that this game takes place in late August in the mid-90s, following the seasons depicted in each film. Without further ado...

 

~~~

From the Metrodome in the Twin Cities, hello again everyone! This is Wally Holland, excited to bring you tonight's game between the Minnesota Twins and Cleveland Indians. This series, much like this season, has brought us a lot of drama between two teams jockeying for playoff position.

 

It's a medley of great stories under the teflon roof tonight, with 13-year-old manager Billy Heywood trying to lead his first-place Twins to the playoffs after they came oh-so-close a year ago. His club is working hard to fend off a determined Indians team under the far more battle-tested Lou Brown.

 

This has been a trying year for Heywood, who's missed time due to multiple groundings from his mother. The challenges of algebra class have become challenges for the Twins, but luckily they've been able to weather the storm, with Heywood's pitching coach and right-hand man Mac MacNally filling in as needed.

 

The Twins take the field, and heading to the mound it's Mike McGrevey, the feisty veteran rotation fixture. McGrevey re-signed with Minnesota as a free agent during the offseason, which was an unexpected turn of events given his initial friction with Heywood as the manager. Sure enough, McGrevey's been the kid's most reliable starter for much the season.

 

He's done with his warmup and we're ready to get underway here in the Dome, as Cleveland's leadoff hitter steps into the batter's box.

 

It is of course Willie "Mays" Hayes, the speedy center fielder for the Indians. Hayes enjoying another strong season with a .294 average to go along with 47 steals. This is a guy you do not want on base.

 

First pitch from McGrevey in there for a called strike.

 

The veteran right-hander brings a solid fastball to go along with a sweeping curve, and will mix in a changeup now and then. He has worked to a 12-8 record and 3.89 ERA so far in the campaign.

 

The righty's second offering misses the outside corner to even the count at 1-1.

 

Sizable crowd here in Minneapolis tonight – a welcome change from what were accustomed to last year around the time. It's been great to see the fans come out for this winning team, and you know that seeing the wunderkind skipper is a big part of the attraction. Reports suggest that the rousing curtain-call ovation Heywood received after the Twins fell short against Seattle in last year's Game 163 tiebreaker inspired a change of heart on Billy's initial decision to step aside.

 

McGrevey winds up and delivers. Hayes swings and pops it up. A lazy fly to shallow right, and Kain has it measured it for the first out. Lou Brown can't be happy to see Hayes get under another one, as the raspy manager has been working tirelessly with the speedster to get the ball on the ground consistently.

 

Here now comes the shortstop Reyna, who flicks away McGrevey's first offering right of first base. Collins jogs over a look, and watches it land five rows back. Count is 0-1. McGrevey receives it back from the catcher Hodges and he's back at it, working quickly. Gets the sign and here's the pitch.

 

Reyna turns on it and drives the ball to left field. Charging toward the line is Lonnie Ritter and he ... MAKES the catch! A nice running grab by Lonnie to retire the shortstop, and that'll bring up Roger Dorn with two outs.

 

Dorn a veteran staple for the Indians, better known for his bat than his glove. He's been fighting it a bit of late, but some good news for the Tribe ... [receives note] ... On Friday night games in August, played indoors when the outside temperature is higher than 73 degrees, Dorn is batting .385 for the year.

 

McGrevey's first pitch is low, and Dorn holds off. One-and-nothing the count.

 

Plenty of experience in this matchup, as both McGrevey and Dorn have been around for quite a while. Each formed a reputation for being brash and a bit contentious in the clubhouse last season, but tensions have simmered this summer. For that you've gotta give their managers a lot of credit – Brown and Heywood both take a no-nonsense approach with their mercurial vets.

 

Second pitch from McGrevey misses again, and now he's behind Dorn 2-0. The Twins starter will want to be careful here with the dangerous cleanup hitter Pedro Cerrano on deck.

 

McGrevey has the sign and here's the delivery ... JUST high, and now he's at risk of putting a runner on base for one of the league's top sluggers. Cerrano currently ranking second in the American League in home runs behind New York's Clu Haywood.

 

That is of course no relation to Billy Heywood, who is peering peering out from the dugout here as McGrevey takes a brief stroll around the mound. Dorn staring down to third and receiving a sign, but he ... appears to be shaking it off.

 

The windup, and here's the 3-0 pitch ... Dorn swings, and hits it straight up in the air! The catcher Hodges is underneath it and makes the easy catch for out number three. Boy, it sure looked like Dorn ignored a take call there and chased outside the zone. Lou Brown does NOT look happy in the Indians dugout.

 

Nonetheless, Cleveland is down in order and now the Twins will come up to bat. We'll bring you the bottom of the first after a word from our sponsors!

 

[Hey everyone. It's me, Nick. Hope you're enjoying. If you haven't recently, I highly recommend a Little Big League viewing. As mentioned, I watched it ahead of writing this and it brought back some memories. The movie didn't so much make me nostalgic for baseball as it made me nostalgic for the Metrodome. For those who spent a lot of time there in the '90s, seeing all of its quirks and crannies represented on-screen is a treat. I miss that place. Anyway, we're returning from break.]

 

Welcome back to the Metrodome, where the Twins are getting ready to come to bat. On the mound tonight for Cleveland it's the ageless Eddie Harris, who continues to get it done as he approaches 40. The crafty right-hander can't reach the 90s with his heater anymore, but his guile has proven enough to get him by as he keeps soaking up innings for the Indians. Harris has been their steadiest starter since hard-throwing Rick Vaughn moved to the bullpen.

 

Stepping to the plate, it's second baseman Mickey Scales, Minnesota's own lightning-quick leadoff man. He can't quite match the speed of Willie Mays Hayes, but then again, who can? Scales is nonetheless enjoying himself a nice second season in the majors after struggling to find his way at times as a rookie.

 

Harris lobs in a breaking ball that floats over the plate for strike one as Scales watches.

 

The second baseman has made major strides since Billy Heywood took over as manager, seeming to benefit from a more laid-back style of instruction as opposed to the red-ass technique of George O'Farrell, who was dismissed from his post in part because of Heywood's disagreement with that approach.

 

Here comes the second pitch from Harris. Scales swings and hits a chopper to short. Reyna gloves it and fires to Metcalf at first ... GOT HIM by a hair! Scales ran hard down the line there but a nice play by the Cleveland shortstop retires him for out number one.

 

Next up, a player who needs no introduction. Twins fans have come to cherish seeing his number 34 out in center field at the Metrodome. Yes, of course I'm talking about Spencer Hamilton. He's ready, and takes a ball inside from Harris.

 

Previously known for his glove, Hamilton has had a bit of an offensive breakthrough working with hitting coach Jerry Johnson, who as recently as last year was playing alongside Hamilton in the Twins outfield.

 

Swing and a miss at the slow breaking ball from Harris, and the count is even at one.

 

Boy, that pitch really had some spin on it. Might've been one that Harris amusingly refers to as a "Vaseline Ball." The savvy righty is still finding ways to keep batters guessing after all these years, and we all remember that magnificent effort in the AL West tiebreaker game against the Yankees last year, where Harris hurled 8 2/3 innings of two-run ball, setting up Jake Taylor's walk-off bunt single.

 

Here comes the 1-1 to Hamilton ... it bounces in front of the plate for ball two as Taylor smothers it. Maybe a little too much vaseline on that one!

 

Circling back to Jerry Johnson, the Twins' hitting instructor is still adapting and adjusting to a new role. Johnson opened last season as Minnesota's right fielder, but the former star was showing his age, and he was running on fumes by the time Billy Heywood made the hard choice to release him.

 

Hamilton checks his swing on an offspeed pitch away, and it's 3-1.

 

There were some hard feelings initially when Johnson was let go, but Heywood later brought him back in as hitting coach, and Johnson has made a big impact with developing young players like Scales and Hamilton.

 

Harris looking slightly frazzled on the mound as he tries to come back and get the Twins' center fielder, reaching to the bill of his cap repeatedly. He winds up and delivers ... Hamilton swings and smashes toward third, past a reaching Dorn! It skips down the turf and rattles around near the bullpen mounds. Tomlinson gathers it in an d throws to the infield, but he won't be in time to get Hamilton, who pulls into second with a double. Heywood is up on the top step of the dugout clapping. That'll bring up the first baseman Lou Collins with a man in scoring position.

 

Ever the fan favorite, Collins receives a nice ovation as he steps into the left-handed batter's box. This matchup with Harris bodes well for him since ... [receives note] ... Collins is batting .355 in home games against right-handed pitchers born in even-numbered years.

 

Here's the first pitch from Harris ... Collins jumps on it and drives a liner to straightaway center. Charging in is Hayes, and he scoops it up as Hamilton rounds third with Jerry Johnson waving him home. Throw to the plate is ... OFF LINE and Taylor can't get back in time to apply the tag. Twins take a 1-0 lead here in the first!

 

Collins with an aggressive approach in that AB, jumping on the get-me-over fastball from Harris to drive in the game's first run. Of course, Collins isn't known for wasting time, as he famously proposed to Billy Heywood's mother last fall, following just a few shorts months of courtship. They're set to be wed this winter, and the engagement seems to be doing his numbers some good, as Collins leads the Twins in RBIs and is among the league leaders.

 

Stepping to the plate now is Minnesota's best pure slugger, the designated hitter Leon Alexander. He and Collins have provided a powerful 1-2 lefty punch in the heart of Heywood's batting order.

 

Harris checks the runner and comes set. First pitch to Alexander is swung on and missed for strike one.

 

The big man Alexander has gone from getting occasional work at first base to fully-time DH duties, with Collins starting every single at first since returning from his late-season benching by Heywood last year. The position seems to suit Leon well, as he leads the Twins in homers, making a habit of sending them over the big blue baggy in right.

 

The 0-1 coming from Harris and Alexander swings. Ground ball to second base, it's right at Larson. Throws to Reyna and the relay is IN TIME to get Alexander at first. A twin killing, and Minnesota's down here in the first, but not before staking an early lead on the bat of Lou Collins.

 

Twins one, Indians nothing! We'll be back for the second inning shortly.

 

[Actually, that's all for today's installment but I will be back with a follow-up soon, which fast-forwards to the ninth inning as a thrilling finish unfolds. Stay tuned to Twins Daily for that one, because things are gonna get... wild (insert wink emoji)]

 

 

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[DocBauer]

Some of the dumbest ideas turn out to be great in the end.

 

Lots of fun!

 

Love the Ueker...err, Harry Doyle... overtones in the broadcast. Purposeful I'm sure.

[Hawkeye12]

I've always enjoyed that Lou Collins and Mike McGrevey have their jerseys displayed on the wall of Dorn's office in Major League 3 when he's the Twins GM.  Fun movie crossover continuity.

[Trov]

I think Heywood is the better manager, he is forward thinking and was ready to embrace the new shift in baseball strategy.  He also would think more than "what the book says" type approach.  He would let Lou swing away thinking about how having him bunt would crush the middle of the order.  Heywood is willing to pull of trick plays, however, he may get distracted with the duel roll of owner and manager, those two hats may be difficult to switch between. 

 

Lou on other hand makes his hitters do push ups if they hit the ball in the air.  However, I much more loved the don't give a crap attitude of Lou Brown.  You want to manage Cleveland this year?  "Hold on, I got a guy on the other line about some white walls."  How about pissing on the contract of Dorn.  

[BobAzar]

This is so ridiculous and brilliant. It's exactly what I needed right now. Thanks Nick.

Also, thank you for addressing why Billy is still the manager when he had decided to step down in the movie (pushes glasses back up the bridge of my nose). 

Most importantly, THANK YOU for putting in Wally's inane statistics. My wife and I mock those all the time watching real games. 

 

PS: my claim to fame, the 3rd base coach for the Twins was my high school baseball coach. and I was in the crowd for the standing ovation after game 163. They filmed before a random game, and they just announced over the PA that we need to cheer and chant BILLY, BILLY!. we had no idea what was going on, although I was 9 at the time. 

[ashbury]

Stay tuned to Twins Daily for that one, because things are gonna get... wild (insert wink emoji)]

Will it make my heart sing? Will it make everything.... groovy?

[theBOMisthebomb]

 

PS: my claim to fame, the 3rd base coach for the Twins was my high school baseball coach...

Kent Paulson was a great guy. I played baseball and varsity basketball for him at Roseville High School in the late 1980s.