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Latin American Baseball Prospect Dreams Of Day He’s Good Enough To Be Robbed at Gunpoint


Ben Remington

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-SHTICKBALL-

Baseball prospects are by nature full of hope and promise, but for some prospects, that hope and promise takes on a completely different meaning.

 

“You just watch, you’re going to see me, on ESPN, talking about being held at gunpoint someday.” Baseball Prospect Juan Jose Carlos said. “I’m going to take this game by storm, I’m going to play in the All Star Game, then, I’m going to get all of jewelry taken as soon as I go home.”

 

The path to the Major Leagues is a long and tough journey, and for those fortunate enough to put together the talent, opportunity and just the right amount of undetectable performance enhancing drugs, riches beyond their wildest dreams await them. Unfortunately for those very same players, countrymen low on morals and high on desperation await them as well.

 

It’s a reality for many baseball players from Latin American countries, walking down the street in their hometowns without a small army of armed security is more dangerous than any roadtrip to the Bronx or Baltimore, and almost as dangerous as the South Side of Chicago. These nations are so impoverished that robbing homegrown talent is as commonplace as wearing flip flop sandals.

 

Juan Jose Carlos said he wasn’t sure how he would be robbed, knowing his hometown, saying it’s equally likely that he’s robbed at gunpoint, or just briefly kidnapped long enough to lose all of his valuables. He also said he didn’t believe that he would be extorted by anyone close to him, but was excited at the prospect of it, and interested to find out who it would be, guessing that it could be his uncle or best friend from grade school.

 

“It’s really exciting, you know?” Juan Jose Carlos said. “I mean, I could be that good someday. Talented enough to be dragged from my car, or idolized enough to have my wife’s life threatened if we dare walk down the street after dark. I really look forward to that level of fame if this whole baseball thing works out.” He also added that he’s still not going to carry any kind of weapon for defensive purposes, given the wacky history of Latin American ballplayers killing people and ending their own careers.

 

In the end, Juan Jose Carlos said even though his expectations for fortune are dark in some people’s eyes, he’s just glad that he didn’t get skimmed by the major league scout that signed him, because that likely would have cost him much more money than just losing his Rolex and wedding ring sometime around a future Christmas visit. Whatever else comes his way, he’s ready and looking forward to his future filled with baseball, money and the constant fear of being killed accidentally.

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