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My day job is copywriting for a local independent regional craft brewery. That brewery also hosts concerts in its backyard, often featuring popular recording artists from around the world. Occasionally, those shows attract local and even national celebrities.
On Wednesday, popular Sad Dad favorites The National played a killer show there. (If you’ve never heard of them, that’s fine, but just know that Taylor Swift has).
As I wandered around the grounds, one of my friends said, “Hey, Joe Mauer is here.” I didn’t believe them. I guess I don't really know what Joe Mauer's musical tastes are, other than "What You Know" being his walk-up music for 100 years. Then a local journalist mentioned that he chatted with Mauer and his wife for a bit. Given that he covers baseball for his job, I took him at his word. And sure enough, standing there just to my right and towards the front of the stage? Joe Mauer, Cretin-Derham Hall Class of 2001. These are my observations.
- He’s tall! You know how some athletes look “normal” on TV because they’re surrounded by absolute leviathans? Joe Mauer is crazy tall!
- He was wearing a baseball cap. On brand! That’s what he wore at his old job!
- He did the classic “dad at a rock concert head nod,” for when you’re not going to throw horns or dance, but still want to rock out a little bit without making a scene.
- Reliable sources tell me his wife is a huge fan of The National and indie rock/alternative in general. I share those interests, which gives me the wild hope that I’ll run into the Mauers at the McLusky show at the Turf Club in December so we can shout along to “Reformed Arsonist Seeks Child Bride.”
- I didn’t bother him to say hi or buy him a beer. Let the guy enjoy retirement and go to shows. I also remember how much his last contract was worth thanks to years of numbskulls getting mad at him on talk radio and god’s own internet for hitting singles and making $23 million per year. He probably doesn’t need a Furious on the house.
- That said, Joe, if you’re reading this and want some IPAs, let me know. Perkins has my phone number.
- There’s no way Joe Mauer is reading this.
- This also means I didn’t ask him about Rocco pulling Joe Ryan during a no-hit bid. Had I done this, I hope someone reading this would have the decency to beat me to death with a shovel.
- The last time I saw him in person was the game where he got the concussion that ended his catching career. This was a better day!
- This was the most famous person I’ve seen at work since Woody Harrelson attended a Gary Clark, Jr. show while in town filming a movie. Apologies to Jason DeRusha, who I think is a very kind man but he wasn't on Cheers.
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