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Article: Game Thread: Twins v Royals, 8/12 @ 7:10pm CT


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Before the rains came… things were looking good for the Twins and pretty bad for the Astros. A 5-0 Twins lead interrupted by rain on Wednesday shook out into 25 runs for the Astros in one single Thursday. Talk about an extreme change of fortune.

The Twins now must shake it off and face the Royals at Target Field. They are a good opponent for our Twins because they haven’t been able to shake things off this entire year.

I know what you are thinking… clearly… this was a shaky intro.

Here are some things to think about:

 

1. Milkshakes – To be perfectly clear… you can go to McDonald's and get one of those shakes coming out of a machine and it’s still pretty good. But… but… McDonald's has to know that it can’t compete with a milkshake when it’s done as God intended… and that’s hand scooped premium ice cream into a steel cup. Money can’t buy you love but it can buy you a damn good milkshake.

2.A Leaf – Shaking like a leaf? A leaf? I guess I don’t spend enough time looking at trees. I think the person who came up with this idiom was probably stuck in a tree and couldn’t see anything but leaves. If Grandma was in the tree with him… the saying would be much different.

3. Earthquakes – Now these things can really do some shaking. I have no idea what it’s like to be in one but I’ve heard stories. Tectonic plates are always slowing moving and sometimes they get stuck. This causes a sudden release of energy which causes the ground to shake and destroys all the painstaking work done on etch-a-sketches in a 50 mile radius.

4. Tambourines – If the lead singer of a band can’t play guitar, the other band members insist on them doing something else to help fill out the sound. During instrumental sections of songs… the lead singer would leave the stage… get a drink of something… pick up women… whatever they wanted to do… it was time off that the others couldn’t get without a noticeable musical hole. This was why the tambourine was invented. Either make that lead singer shake this thing for additional sound or shove his head through the drum in jealousy. Turns out… most audiences would rather see the latter.

5. Handshakes – Let’s be honest… these things are a little out of control. They are conducted during greetings and departures and in moments of congratulations, the reaching of agreements, signs of sportsmanship and point to point germ passing. Sometimes you hug… sometimes you shake hands... sometimes one person goes for the hug while the other goes for the handshake. This can cause a brief period of awkwardness and longer periods dealing with a lawsuit depending on where your hand lands while reaching forward toward the incoming hugger.

____________________

Lineups:

ROYALS
Paulo Orlando [R) CF
Cheslor Cuthbert [R) 3B
Lorenzo Cain [R) RF
Eric Hosmer (L) 1B
Kendrys Morales (S) DH
Salvador Perez [R) C
Alex Gordon (L) LF
Alcides Escobar [R) SS
Raul Mondesi (S) 2B

Yordano Ventura [R) P

TWINS
Brian Dozier [R) 2B
Joe Mauer (L) 1B
Max Kepler (L) RF
Miguel Sano [R) DH
Eddie Rosario (L) CF
Trevor Plouffe [R) 3B
Jorge Polanco (S) SS
Kurt Suzuki [R) C
Robbie Grossman (S) LF

Kyle Gibson [R) P

Forecast: Well, currently it's 70s and rainy. It will eventually move out. Could be a delayed start, but we'll get this one in.

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What many people don't know about Charo is that she is also an amazing classical Spanish guitarist.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmNPXqG6ovg

I've actually seen Charo.  She was performing on a cruise that my wife and I were on.  I had little desire to see her, but my wife really wanted to go so of course we went.  I didn't realize she played guitar either.  I have to say that I came away really impressed with her classical guitar skills.  I didn't care much for the rest of it, but I did really enjoy her musical talents.

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...

 

1. Milkshakes – To be perfectly clear… you can go to McDonald's and get one of those shakes coming out of a machine and it’s still pretty good. But… but… McDonald's has to know that it can’t compete with a milkshake when it’s done as God intended… and that’s hand scooped premium ice cream into a steel cup. Money can’t buy you love but it can buy you a damn good milkshake.

 

...

 

 

It got explained to me early on that in New England, if you asked for a milkshake, you got something made from milk, presumably shaken... Strangely enough, i never verified this claim. It could be merely stirred.

 

If you wanted ice cream in it, you had to order this thing called a frappe. Rhymes with cap. I know, it contradicts all i learned about the silent e. And how could Tom Lehrer be wrong?

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It got explained to me early on that in New England, if you asked for a milkshake, you got something made from milk, presumably shaken... Strangely enough, i never verified this claim. It could be merely stirred.

If you wanted ice cream in it, you had to order this thing called a frappe. Rhymes with cap. I know, it contradicts all i learned about the silent e. And how could Tom Lehrer be wrong?

First time I went to a pub in London I asked for a screwdriver. bartender took my order and jump out from behind the bar and went into an office.  Came out a couple minutes later with an actual screwdriver :-)

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First time I went to a pub in London I asked for a screwdriver. bartender took my order and jump out from behind the bar and went into an office.  Came out a couple minutes later with an actual screwdriver :-)

Cool!

 

I hate to ask... flathead? or slotted?

 

Either way, he went above and beyond...

 

His duty only being to provide fill ups on drinks.

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First time I went to a pub in London I asked for a screwdriver. bartender took my order and jump out from behind the bar and went into an office.  Came out a couple minutes later with an actual screwdriver :-)

Be glad you didn't ask him for Sex On The Beach. Though, in fairness, he probably would have thrown in the Fuzzy Navel for free.

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Logistics are complicated.

 

But if things work out, i probably will be driving around the midwest in the coming weeks.

 

Any advice y'all have regarding scratching the baseball itch?

 

It would seem my more practical options would be...

 

a) try to infiltrte a Twins game in KC.

B) visit Target field the first game of the Detroit series.

c) Cedar Rapids?

 

I will poke my college friend in the Twin cities once again, who last i pestered him said, catching him and the state fair probably wouldn't work. But it turns out when i actually looked when it was, that won't work for me neither...

 

Logistics are complicated.

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http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-F5RoJoe-toM/UK-X-V63NEI/AAAAAAAADuM/RCY16ippG9c/s1600/Woman+computer+4.jpg

Concur.

 

Allbeit i was flumoxed trying to respond to the original part of the post...

 

Best i could come up with:

 

Ode to the complexities of online forums

 

Unlike Pat Dean himself.

 

Truly ashburyjohn has a dizzying intellect.

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Pat Dean? You mean the guy who's struggling (5.56 ERA) against AAA batters? They couldn't have called up somebody like Pat Light or add some to the 40 man roster?

 

Great, now we have Dean and Albers in the bullpen. Who woulda thunk?

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Pat Dean? You mean the guy who's struggling (5.56 ERA) against AAA batters? They couldn't have called up somebody like Pat Light or add some to the 40 man roster?

 

Great, now we have Dean and Albers in the bullpen. Who woulda thunk?

And Albers pitched 6 innings yesterday, so we are effectively playing with a 24 man roster for no good reason.

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