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Minnesota Twins Whine Line


Vanimal46

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Hello. I am a forty year old man who has ignored his wife during the summer months for the past 16 years to enjoy the hobby of watching Twins baseball. Now that my spirit is starting to break because of the unbearable baseball this team is playing, I have been thinking about giving it up.

 

The problem is I am not too excited about talking to my wife. I now view my summers as a vacation from her. Do I give it a shot or do I go back to the hobbies of my early twenties, such as practicing the art form of being a peeping tom, making popcorn jewelry, and going to random churches on Sundays dressed as a woman?

 

I'm confused. I need some advice.

Bark's you came to the right place. I'm not a married man myself, but after 16 years is there anything new to talk about?

 

I'd personally choose reliving your early 20's activities. Sounds way more fun than conversing with significant others.

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I think most fans' frustration is that there still seem to be some organization philosophies that we're not interested in, like swinging hard (in case you hit it) and trying to make the opposing batters miss our pitches.  We assume they're driven from the TR down

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Hey, second time caller here......

 

Do we think the beard is distracting him when he looks out at the pitcher? It's got to be that, right? He's so awesome......

 

And, how about that new Jetson guy? It's funny how his name is like Elroys!

Mike at this rate my program director will notice all of your great questions and have you take over my job!

 

There's a fine line with beard length. The minute it gets too long it becomes itchy. The only explanation for 0-3 games since he's so awesome is the beard was too itchy...... that's a scolding hot take you won't see anywhere else than Minnesota Twins Whine Line.

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Hey Vanimal,

 

first time / long time, love your program.

 

Do you have any info on Oswaldo Arcia? Has he learned to choke up with two strikes and take it the other way, or is he still swinging for the fences every time. What do you rate his chances of ever learning to hit at the Major League level?

 

Thanks, I'll take my answer off the air.

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Bark's you came to the right place. I'm not a married man myself, but after 16 years is there anything new to talk about?

I'd personally choose reliving your early 20's activities. Sounds way more fun than conversing with significant others.

 

Hmmm... me thinks that might take a lot of folks out of the married category.

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Hey Vanimal,

first time / long time, love your program.

Do you have any info on Oswaldo Arcia? Has he learned to choke up with two strikes and take it the other way, or is he still swinging for the fences every time. What do you rate his chances of ever learning to hit at the Major League level?

Thanks, I'll take my answer off the air.

Hosken we have something in common, I love the program too. Can't say I'm a member of Arcia Association (working title) yet to know the answer. I do know that TD poster joethastud broke the news on July 14 that he was eating at Fogo de Chao..... And that was during his hot streak in Rochester. Has anyone seen him at Fogo de Chao since?

 

Long story short, Fogo de Chao = Mashing RHP.

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Bark's you came to the right place. I'm not a married man myself, but after 16 years is there anything new to talk about?

I'd personally choose reliving your early 20's activities. Sounds way more fun than conversing with significant others.

Hey Vanimal. Bark here again. Holy smokes, I cannot believe I got through to you twice in one day. It's like winning the lottery!

 

I will use your advice wisely and to the fullest extent.

 

Love your show, since it's debut, it certainly has made this radio station more formidable.

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Hey Vanimal. Bark here again. Holy smokes, I cannot believe I got through to you twice in one day. It's like winning the lottery!

 

I will use your advice wisely and to the fullest extent.

 

Love your show, since it's debut, it certainly has made this radio station more formidable.

Bark's are you using different names when calling in? Or do I need to fire the intern?

 

All it took was the show heading off the rails to find the vision for Minnesota Twins Whine Line.

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Torii Hunter's a great Twins and all that. But I don't need to see 40 year-old Torii hitting 3rd with a .240's batting average while Oswaldo Arcia, Kennys Vargas, Josmil Pinto and Max Kepler sit in the minors.I also don't need to see Mike Pelfrey make starts while Trevor May and Jose Berrios sit in the minors. Do something about that. it's not too much to ask.

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Hey vaminal, long time, first time, yada yada

 

I see the Twins have let go of Fryer and are returning to Herrmann. My question...is this like a, "deck chairs on the Titanic" rearrangement, or do you feel, like me, that it's not like that at all?

 

Wait for it...

 

Deck chairs occasionally serve a purpose.

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Hey vaminal, long time, first time, yada yada

I see the Twins have let go of Fryer and are returning to Herrmann. My question...is this like a, "deck chairs on the Titanic" rearrangement, or do you feel, like me, that it's not like that at all?

Wait for it...

Deck chairs occasionally serve a purpose.

Do all of you have microphones hidden in my apartment? It's amazing how there's so many long time listeners when this is the inaugural show!

 

Funny thing is, deck chairs on the Titanic are durable, well designed, and <a href="http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/titanic-deckchair-fetches-150-000-auction-article-1.2190202/">valuable</a>. And I believe that's EXACTLY what the Twins are thinking going back to Hermann..

 

EDIT: we're having some technical difficulties folks. If the producer of the program (AKA any moderator) can fix what I'm trying to do....

 

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/titanic-deckchair-fetches-150-000-auction-article-1.2190202

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Do all of you have microphones hidden in my apartment? It's amazing how there's so many long time listeners when this is the inaugural show!

Funny thing is, deck chairs on the Titanic are durable, well designed, and <a href="http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/titanic-deckchair-fetches-150-000-auction-article-1.2190202/">valuable</a>. And I believe that's EXACTLY what the Twins are thinking going back to Hermann..

Microphones?

 

This ain't the 70's.

 

Tiny little cameras. HD.

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Hey Vanimal, great show, big fan here.

Wondering your take on the potential of a future 11 man pen and bunting from the 1st inning on? It's revolutionary I know but I feel if anyone can do it, it's the Twins.

Interested on your take.

North, when it comes to revolutionary ideas, I look....no, I hunt for your guidance. I don't care who the opponent is. There isn't a 3rd baseman OR 1st baseman in the league that can charge a bunt attempt for the entire game. On 29 other teams, those positions are plus power hitters. Imagine it now, North. Miggy getting worn down by the 2nd inning running back and forth. It has the Vanimal Seal of Approval.

 

An 11 man bullpen is another stroke of genius! Humans learn things in sets of 3. With 11 different options, the batters are going to be dumbfounded by so many scouting reports to read.

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hey vanimal -- nick punto had 45 sac bunts in seven years with the twins and he's probably sitting by the phone. any chance he'll be back?

Thanks for calling Mickey. I have no doubt he will be back with the team..... As a special consultant. There isn't anyone else I trust more teaching the fine art of bunting than Nick Punto. Every man has his price to come back to One Twins Way. Me? If they gave me special access to the pre game meals, and take home the leftovers, sign me up! Punto's price can't be much higher.

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What a day listeners. We learned TR is old, it only costs $217K from each of us to buy the Twins, don't trust Nigerean Prince emails, and bunting 100% of the time is the future of baseball. This host's voice is hoarse, and I fired the intern for letting Bark's Lounge slip through the cracks twice.

 

What the hell, I'll answer some calls soon. This concludes show #1 of Minnesota Twins Whine Line....

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Hey Vanimal, pick up. Vanimal?  Aw hell, I'll talk to the voicemail.

I'm tired of paying Joe Mauer $23m to hit like a utility infielder. Can't we cut him and pay Nick Punto $23m to get the real thing instead?

I'm also over Trevor May being brought in when the team's down by 6 in mop-up relief. Just a thought, but can we try him in mop-up relief when the team's up by 6 for a change? 

Great work, love the show etc

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Starting to see the whining buildup over the Mauer issue. That he is just not getting the job done, that we put all this weight on his shoulders.

 

The Twins did spend money this year, and some last year. We should be gald about that. That they put it into the rotation, where Hughes is holding his own, Santana gave half-of-a-year-back and now we wait and see, and Noalsco brings me memories of Joe Mays.

 

They spent money to keep the best catcher in baseball on the team, the hometown icon who is now a first baseman that makes me yearn for Doug Mientkiewicz and his no homers but high average.

 

The hardest job in abseball is a general manager. You have to look at the overall picture, give a manager and coaches the correct players, watch the minor league system ups and downs (amazing how players in the minors go from great to horrible and then great and then nowhere). 

 

Yes, bring in a new general manager who will trade away the system to put a winning team on the field to placate the fan and sell tickets. Maybe yes, maybe no.

 

Yes, winning games will fill the seats in Target Field. The Twins have been having a very ncie run. Wait to see what happens if they keep playing the way they are playing. Will August see smaller crowds. Once school starts, and there isno contention, the stands will be back to 20,000 people and you can buy a cheap ticket on stub hub, and us diehards will be ansxiously waiting 2016, which will still be a rebuilding year as guys need at least 1000 at bats to prove themselves and we will have Sano and Buxton and maybe a new shortstop and someone as backup catcher and Kepler on the horizon to go with Santana, Rosario, Arcia, Vargas, Pinto et all...and Mauer, too.

 

The team is in a slump. The team is in a funk. Again, we look at the parts that will be here in 2016 and play them. We look to get anything we can out of the pile of broken parts that won't be here next season. We start fast-tracking some guys in the minors, rather than playing it safe and holding them back...longer than necessary, at times.

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I know you're not my psychologist, but I had dream last night.  It was weird.  There was a mini-bus and it was driven by TC Bear.  Right behind him in the 1st seat was Terry Ryan whispering something in ear with Paul Molitor sitting in the seat across the aisle.  I couldn't tell if Molitor was agreeing with Ryan or pleading with him to do something else. Anyways the rest of the team was on the bus as well.  Needless to say the mini-bus was driving right towards a cliff and it seemed that TC was accelerating and Terry Ryan was yelling go faster! 

 

What does this mean?

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Starting to see the whining buildup over the Mauer issue. That he is just not getting the job done, that we put all this weight on his shoulders.

 

The Twins did spend money this year, and some last year. We should be gald about that. That they put it into the rotation, where Hughes is holding his own, Santana gave half-of-a-year-back and now we wait and see, and Noalsco brings me memories of Joe Mays.

 

They spent money to keep the best catcher in baseball on the team, the hometown icon who is now a first baseman that makes me yearn for Doug Mientkiewicz and his no homers but high average.

 

The hardest job in abseball is a general manager. You have to look at the overall picture, give a manager and coaches the correct players, watch the minor league system ups and downs (amazing how players in the minors go from great to horrible and then great and then nowhere).

 

Yes, bring in a new general manager who will trade away the system to put a winning team on the field to placate the fan and sell tickets. Maybe yes, maybe no.

 

Yes, winning games will fill the seats in Target Field. The Twins have been having a very ncie run. Wait to see what happens if they keep playing the way they are playing. Will August see smaller crowds. Once school starts, and there isno contention, the stands will be back to 20,000 people and you can buy a cheap ticket on stub hub, and us diehards will be ansxiously waiting 2016, which will still be a rebuilding year as guys need at least 1000 at bats to prove themselves and we will have Sano and Buxton and maybe a new shortstop and someone as backup catcher and Kepler on the horizon to go with Santana, Rosario, Arcia, Vargas, Pinto et all...and Mauer, too.

 

The team is in a slump. The team is in a funk. Again, we look at the parts that will be here in 2016 and play them. We look to get anything we can out of the pile of broken parts that won't be here next season. We start fast-tracking some guys in the minors, rather than playing it safe and holding them back...longer than necessary, at times.

This might take a show of its own.

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Hey vanimal, long time listener and spy.  Have a question for you though.  Can you comment on the specifics of what Boyer might have over the front office/managerial staff that keeps him in the pen?  Is there any truth to the rumor that Tim Stauffer handed over these incriminating photos before he left?

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Gooooood morning all of you Whiners! Sorry for the delay, I was hunting for a new intern to answer the phones. Nobody I interviewed was able to answer this question.... "If Bark's Lounge calls in twice in one show, what are you going to do about it?" So now I'm stuck hosting the show, AND answering the phones. 

 

We're going to take a quick break so I can drink some coffee, and answer your calls. Stay tuned!

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AND we're back! I received a voice mail from a guy in Australia last night. At first I thought this has to be a wrong number, but I learned people care about baseball outside of America!

 

 

Hey Vanimal, pick up. Vanimal?  Aw hell, I'll talk to the voicemail.

I'm tired of paying Joe Mauer $23m to hit like a utility infielder. Can't we cut him and pay Nick Punto $23m to get the real thing instead?

I'm also over Trevor May being brought in when the team's down by 6 in mop-up relief. Just a thought, but can we try him in mop-up relief when the team's up by 6 for a change? 

Great work, love the show etc

 

Sydney, you must be used to talking to voice mails with your time difference. Is there SportsCenter in Australia? Because you should be leading that with your brilliant takes! I'm all for cutting Joe Mauer so he can figure out the exact point where his sideburns end, and the beard begins. And getting Nick Punto at that rate of $23 million? ABSOLUTE STEAL.

 

Joe doesn't understand the concentration and dedication towards bunting a baseball. He tries swinging the bat so hard, and the ball trickles too far in the direction of 2nd base. Punto wouldn't make that mistake.....

 

Humans are creatures of habit. And Trevor May has adjusted to only coming in when the Twins are down by 6. I can only imagine May hyperventilating on the mound if he came into a game up by 6 runs. The pressure man..... No man can handle that pressure. Keep him in the same role, for May's health and safety going forward. 

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Good Morning Vanimal:  First time caller.  I am beside myself--Please HELP!  They closed the threads on Draft Day Rumor Tracker, Draft Gem Duffey Set to Debut, and Struggles have Highlighted Twins Correct Deadline Decisions.  I also broke my favorite DVD--that Tom Hanks film, Praising Terry Ryan. What should I do??

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