Former minor leaguer, author and TBS contributor Dirk Hayhurst wrote a fun-filled story about the stories of Neil Allen, the new Twins pitching coach. 

 

You know it's good when it starts out like this:

 

 

 

I played for Neil back in 2011. Lemme tell ya, you’ve not heard a baseball story until you’ve heard Neil tell one of his, “So I got drunk, got on random plane and just showed up someplace else ’cause that’s what I did between starts” stories. Mind = blown.

Honest to God, his tales of drunken wandering are the stuff of legend. They make Doc Ellis’s  LSD no hitter story look like a PBS special. Ask him to tell you about the time he was out all night at a bar and woke up—still at the bar—just in time to run to the ball park and get suited up for batting practice. He would’ve gotten away with it too if it weren’t for the fact that he put his cowboy boots back on instead of his spikes… Hard to discreetly shag batting practice with cowboy boots on.

 

Probably more important to Twins fan, he continues by saying:

 

 

Wo-oh-oh-oh … I’m not taking a crap on the man by telling you these details. No sir. He’s an excellent coach. A fantastic choice! Twinkie pitchers will love him!

 

 

This could be fun!

Nice read - thanks for posting. 

 

Instruction at point of need is key for people to listen. Like what I've heard about Allen so far - now how about the Twins announce something official.

Thanks for sharing this.  It was a great read.  I'm really excited for the Twins to officially announce this as well.

Just don't let the Twins front office read this before they make the announcement.

Neil Allen interview with Patrick Reusse a half-hour ago. Very good. 

Just don't let the Twins front office read this before they make the announcement.

Maybe this was what separated him from the pack

Every $#(&% who calls the Twins "Twinkies", if not associated with the Twins, becomes irrelevant, as far as I am concerned. Of course this is the same Dirk who accused Buchholz of cheating and Price of sucking. Decent writer of minor league life and stories, but as a baseball critical mind, blah.

Edited November 26, 201411 yr by USAFChief

Every $#(&%  who calls the Twins "Twinkies", if not associated with the Twins, becomes irrelevant, as far as I am concerned.  Of course this is the dame DiRk who accused Buchholz of cheating and Price of sucking.   Decent writer of minor league life and stories, but as a baseball critical mind, blah.

 

Yeah it implies a familiarity Hayhurst does not have, but every lifelong Twins fan has used "Twinkie" at some point and it's not really a word to be protective of and not much of an insult actually.

That ends my scold for the day.

Every $#(&% who calls the Twins "Twinkies", if not associated with the Twins, becomes irrelevant, as far as I am concerned. Of course this is the dame DiRk who accused Buchholz of cheating and Price of sucking. Decent writer of minor league life and stories, but as a baseball critical mind, blah.

.

 

 

Well that makes perfect sense...

http://espn.go.com/blog/sweetspot/post/_/id/53719/good-guy-allen-a-smart-hire-for-the-twins

 

 

Good read.  Get more intrigued by him every day.

I have to say the guys drinking exploits are not the best way to sell him as a professional coach. Fortunately there are other data points.

I have to say the guys drinking exploits are not the best way to sell him as a professional coach. Fortunately there are other data points.

 

... and it was over 30 years ago... 

.....but every lifelong Twins fan has used "Twinkie" at some point and it's not really a word to be protective of and not much of an insult actually.

 Not true.  It is always disparaging when used to refer to the Twins. Just because one is a fan doesn't make it endearing, in my opinion.  I hate it and never use it.  I won't even go to a blog site of fans that use it in their title because of it.  The Baseball Project's song from 2010, "Please Don't Call Them Twinkies" says it well. I know the last 4 years have been tough..... but they are still the Twins.

 

Edited November 26, 201411 yr by h2oface

Twinkie, please.

 Not true.  It is always disparaging when used to refer to the Twins. Just because one is a fan doesn't make it endearing, in my opinion.  I hate it and never use it.  I won't even go to a blog site of fans that use it in their title because of it.  The Baseball Project's song from 2010, "Please Don't Call Them Twinkies" says it well. I know the last 4 years have been tough..... but they are still the Twins.

 

 

Glad to be corrected.

 

Also,,

 

Dick says "doink" at 2:08  

I've always preferred Ho-Ho's.

I loved this:

 

"I commissioned a watercolor painting of the image on Neil Allen's rookie card."

 

Despite this sweet little piece of objectivity, this was a really well conceived and well sourced profile. I am liking Allen more and more. I think he's going to work out. Thanks for posting. 

I would have thought there would be more Ding Dong fans here.

I've always preferred Ho-Ho's.

 

I would have thought there would be more Ding Dong fans here.

Too ... many ... comebacks ... must ... refrain ... 

I would have thought there would be more Ding Dong fans here.

You are too polite

You are too polite

Just staying between the lines.....

Just staying between the lines.....

There's that case of beer that goes to the last moderator standing.  Nobody would risk that by getting banned for a crummy joke.

So back to the thread topic, thanks Seth for posting these articles about Allen. He seems quirky and highly respected, sounds like quite an addition to the staff.

I too have never used twinkies, never will and also ignore any article with that in the name. 

Minnesota fans have thin skins.  Twinkies? Viqueens? Woofies?

 

I used to frequent a hockey board where Wild fans would go ballistic if someone referred to them as "Minny."

Minnesota fans have thin skins.  Twinkies? Viqueens? Woofies?

 

I used to frequent a hockey board where Wild fans would go ballistic if someone referred to them as "Minny."

Try going to a 49ers or Giants fan site and talk about "Frisco".

 

Anyway, Neil Allen sounds like an asset for the pitching staff, and should be the source of entertaining articles every now and then as well, as the legend of his off-field exploits also continues to grow.

It certainly will be different to have a coach with one of those... what do they call them?... oh yeah, a personality!

 

Unfortunately, fans probably won't get much opportunity to enjoy it. In this business, the manager talks to fans and media and everybody else pretty much is seen and not heard.

 

The important thing, of course, is that he know what he's talking about when it comes to pitching.