Article: The Ballad Of Big Jim

Download attachment: Thome_Jim_600-321.jpg Twitter started sizzling yesterday. There's a chance Jim Thome rejoins the Minnesota Twins and puts a few more taters over the right field flag pole.

There's no way this helps the Twins long term, but I can't help but be excited. Jim Thome is so heroic Greek mythology borrows heavily from his career.

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Joe Mauer is never going to be that kind of hero. He's the quiet, unappreciated type. Biographies of the cool, consistent catcher will mention how little respect he got in his home town. They'll quote Aaron Gleeman's tweets about fans booing the local boy.

Justin Morneau actually has the potential to achieve that kind of heroism this year. Thing is, if he does, he might get traded away. We get it. We're Twins fans. We can't have nice things.

If Josh Willingham dodges the slump we all fear is coming, he could be something to sing about. Disliking Josh Willingham is genetically impossible. He's more strong, silent cowboy than cold-eyed gunslinger, though.

Putting Thome in a Twins uniform will take plate appearances from players who will actually be part of the team's future. If his major league time has finally run out, watching his final whiffs at the plate will break hearts.

I still hope they do it. I buy Twins tickets to buy stories and memories, and there's no way I'm buying any stories about a playoff run this year. It'll be a few years before I'm purchasing tales of breakout seasons and new team chemistry (unless Kyle Gibson and some of the new pitchers catch fire).

Even it hurts the Twins, I want them to spend money for another summer of Thome. The city just seems safer and holier when you can rest assured he's standing somewhere with a bat in one hand and a smile on his mug.

If the Twins front office saves me from my sentimental longings, that's probably for the best. I'm not saying I'm thinking smart here.

I just can't be the guy to deny a smiling Jim Thome a trip to the batter's box.

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