Daniel and I are huge fans of the television show, “Community.” Outside of the former “Top Gear,” it’s the show we watch the most when we hang out. Since the current Minnesota Twins team is a bunch of underachieving misfits (sans Mauer, Park, and a few others), we decided to compare current and recent Twins players as some of your favorite faces at Greendale. Greendale’s school slogan is “E. Pluribus Anus,” which is fitting for the kind of baseball the Twins have played through the month of April.

Britta Perry – Kevin Jepsen:

This wasn’t much of a stretch. If you’ve ever watched the show, you know Britta is the butt end of most jokes, much the same way Jepsen has been the butt end of a bad bullpen. As someone who’s constantly blamed for ruining things, Jepsen has blown enough saves this year that he’s the teams Britta. We see flashes of Britta’s genius(?), kind of like Jepsen’s 2015 with the Twins. However, it happens infrequently, and it’s not enough to rely on either of them. He is human tennis elbow, he is the pizza burn on the roof of the world’s mouth, he is the opposite of Batman.

Jeff Winger – Miguel Sano:

While the lead role of Community would better fit someone like Plouffe, Mauer, or even Dozier; Miguel has shown he has the personality of one Mr. Winger. Maybe a bit full of himself after his debut last season, he’s still a young player looking to find his way. While Jeff has his goals and dreams, along with his selfishness, and many insecurities; Sano seems to be a big picture guy. Miguel wants what’s best for the team, while Jeff wants what’s best for him. Hopefully Sano will mature quickly, and find the swing that Twins fans grew to love in a few short months.

Shirley Bennett – Brian Dozier:

Dozier has a sweet, Southern likeability to him, much like Shirley has a sweet, Lord driven likeability to her. Most of the time they’re lovely, and even keeled... Most of the time. Sometimes they’ll fly off the handle when things aren’t going their way. Through it all both of them find ways to dig down and achieve their roles to the best of their abilities. While I enjoy watching these two have meltdowns (especially when Dozier is yelling about balls and strikes on his way back to the dugout), it’s the friendly smiles and laughter that keeps you coming back. Though sometimes at a distance. And let’s be honest; the Dozier’s Christmas card was the best thing you saw in 2015.

Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir – Eduardo Escobar, Eduardo Nunez, Eddie Rosario:

“Ed, Edd, and Eddy” would be a much better comparison, but these three are rarely brought up without one of the other two being named. Just like Troy and Abed, the Eddie’s seem bound to each other. While I don’t know if they have a sweet handshake, or if they’ve ever hosted a fake TV show together; the Eddies come up clutch. Just look at what Rosario and Escobar did throughout last season. Now Nunez is hitting like his job depends on it. Though if his job depended on how often his helmet stayed on his head, he’d be gone faster than his helmet falls off his head.

Pierce Hawthorne – Ricky Nolasco:

The elder statesman of the group, Pierce isn’t liked or respected by many of his peers. While his peers may like him, Twins Territory seems pretty hell bent on shipping Ricky Nolasco as soon as humanly possible. While doing just enough to stay productive and in the good graces of his Greendale classmates, Nolasco has seemingly done the same through 2016. Off to a better than his career average start, Nolasco has been rather dependable. Much like Pierce, Twins fans are waiting for the other shoe to drop, and see the not so nice side of Ricky. That is, the Ricky that looks very similar to Kevin Jepsen, A.K.A; Britta. Maybe Ricky’s in it for the long haul, or maybe Ricky’s in it for Ricky. Either way, Ricky hasn’t been the villain since spring training. Hopefully Ricky’s turned a new leaf in Minnesota. Hopefully…

Annie Edison – Joe Mauer:

I don’t think Joe has ever had a reliance on Adderall (possibly Kemps milk), but he’s definitely the goody-two-shoes of the Twins. Annie never wants conflict or to disappoint people, and is usually reliable. Sound familiar? Mauer’s had a rebirth in 2016 to the delight of some, and to the chagrin of those who wish he’d catch, hit 30+ dingers, and knock in 110+ RBIs in a season (psssst, #ItsNotHappening nerds). I guess the better comparison would be John Cena; a solid contributor who does what he can to help the team. While half of the fans are excited to see Joe healthy and hitting, others want their power first-baseman to do what Byung-Ho Park was brought in to do. Guess you can’t please everyone, no matter how good your career has been.

Ben Chang – Oswaldo Arcia:

Ken Joeng’s portrayal of the borderline insane Ben Chang seems to fit Arcia well. While not always the focal point, and not always helpful, Arcia is definitely an enigma. Teammates described Arcia earlier this year with the following; “Overreacts to everything, loves to be the center of attention, and the hair isn’t working.” I don’t think I ever questioned Ben Chang’s hair style, but that would describe him to a T. In the later seasons of Community, Chang became more of a frenemy (yes, I’m ashamed I used that too) and had some memorable episodes. Arcia’s April had some ups and downs, but he looked more like his 2014 self than 2015, which should give Twins fans hope that he can help the team this year, and in the future.

“Dean” Craig Pelton – Torii Hunter:

Yeah, Torii’s not around this season, but you can bet he’s not far away from what’s happening with this team. The Dean was a outrageous (Torii’s dance parties), a unifying force when things weren’t going well (2015), and a helpful mentor when need be. While The Dean was insecure in himself, and had some odd fetishes that turned some people off, Torii was very staunch in his beliefs, and wasn’t afraid to butt heads when he thought he was right (see: The Dean’s insane costumes, and Torii ripping his jersey off in April/May 2015). Torii was an advisor for a few weeks in spring training, helping to shape and mold the outfield to be the best they can be. I can’t imagine he won’t be a coach for the Twins in some capacity very soon. Torii breathes baseball, the same way The Dean breathes Greendale. If Torii starts to show up in questionable costumes with no reason, the comparison will be officially complete.

Magnitude – Byung-Ho Park:

“Magnetic Attitude,” or Magnitude, for short; he’s described as a one man party known for his catchphrase, “Pop, pop!” In fact, that’s about all Magnitude says during all six seasons of Community. Byung-Ho Park, known by his nickname, “#ParkBang,” is a one man wrecking crew. Park’s up to 6 home runs as of this writing, and has captured the hearts of Twins Territory with his smile, and monster home runs. Park’s English is getting better, but fans and teammates continue to call him by #ParkBang, and I’m not mad about that at all. Park’s shown that he’s learning on the fly, and his stat line continues to improve each week. He’d be a main player on offense and defense, if only we could get rid of that under-achieving Mauer guy… /sarcasm

We obviously missed a good chunk of the roster, and that was by design. There just weren’t enough memorable characters to fill out this article. And as much as I’d like to keep making comparisons, this article is for a very specific audience. We did decide that Ron Gardenhire is the Leonard of the Twins, and Danny Santana is the Starburns, based on their questionable hair choices. What did you think? Did we miss some easy comparisons?

Do you agree or disagree with our choices? Let us know in the comments section, and don’t forget to follow us on the Innanetz.

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