After ten days I'm back from Montana. And I'm happy to report that Luis Perdomo's cup of coffee with the Minnesota Twins has turned into something rapidly approaching a real date! Sure, the Twins might just have called him up out of desperation, a need to have SOMEONE with them, and a desire to feel attractive again (even only for a moment). But Perdomo could easily have screwed the pooch and gotten kicked to the curb with another disastrous outing, or by calling Terry Ryan fat or something.

Instead, Perdomo has been appreciated if still underwhelming; the ultimate low-leverage situation pitcher who comes in with the game's outcome not remotely in doubt, can be trusted to do a middling job, and will totally take you to the brake shop if you need to pick up your car.

(The Key stats: in 14 days, he's made 3 appearances going 4.66 Innings, 4 hits allowed (2 Doubles), 2 inherited runners (both of whom scored) and a Strike to Ball ratio of 45:34--that's about 9 strikes per 7 balls...)

Meanwhile Luis Perdomo's beard may yet be given the coveted position of "facial hair of the year" for the Twins' franchise. The potential of his chin scruff is clear, and the Twins front office is all twitterpated in the hopes that the beard may yet infect the rest of Perdomo's body and create a super reliever (one who's more than just a safety date).

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Key Stats for Luis Perdomo's beard in the past two weeks: 3.8 Inches regained (thank you chia seeds!), 4 attempts to battle the Green Monster, 6 Perogi/Clam Chowder flavored CheezIts lost in the tangle of hair, 1 Drew Butera Inspired.

Career Beard Power Rankings: ...#19 George Carlin's, #20 Luis Perdomo's, #21 Jack Sparrow's.