Over the off-season there will be PLENTY of chatter about the Twins. They're primed to be BOLD and make a YUGE splash in free agency.

As a seasoned Twins fan I'm here to save you a bunch of time! The off-season is already predetermined, and your friend Vanimal found the transcript for the most DRAMATIC off-season yet...

10/9: Twins exercise Nelson Cruz' option

10/14: Jim Pohlad quoted in a Sid Hartman column "there will be no restrictions on payroll"

11/1: Ken Rosenthal tweets the Twins are one of several teams interested in free agent pitcher Gerrit Cole.

11/10: Jeff Passan tweets the Twins are attempting to schedule a meeting with Zach Wheeler's representation.

11/11: Zach Wheeler signs 4/$72 million contract with the Philadelphia Phillies.

11/12: Lavelle E Neal writes rushed blog post saying Wheeler's representation never returned the Twins' call.

12/1: Twins add 5 minor Leaguers to 40 man roster. Twins Daily writes that every player added has a floor of an average major league player, and a ceiling of a perennial all star.

12/4: Jake Odorizzi signs a 5/$75 million contract with the Houston Astros.

12/6: Pat Reusse writes column that the Twins gave an honest attempt to sign Odorizzi. Didn't want to commit to 5th guaranteed year.

1/13: Twins sign SP Homer Bailey to minor league contract with invite to spring training.

1/14: Twins season ticket holders receive automated email informing them prices will increase for the 2020 season.

1/27: Jon Heyman tweets the Twins make Gerrit Cole their top priority.

2/1: Dave St. Peter announces a new bar will be constructed 30 feet above the pitcher's mound held up by suspension cables! For $15,000 you can be RIGHT ON TOP of the action drinking your favorite local craft brew!

2/11: Lavelle E Neal reports Jose Berrios has turned down extension offer from the Twins.

2/15: Twins announce NEW FOOD offerings at Target Field.

2/26: Gerrit Cole signs 8/$275 million contract with the Los Angeles Dodgers.

3/4: Twins sign free agent SP Tanner Roark to 1/$12 million contract with a team option for 2nd year.

3/13: Lavelle E Neal reports SP Brusdar Graterol is in team's plans to make opening day rotation.

3/14: Brusdal Graterol optioned to AAA spring training.

3/28: Twins realize they're still short 1 starting pitcher, re-sign Kyle Gibson to minor league contract with "opt-out" on May 1.

You're welcome!