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About this blog

All the effort of some sort of horrible amalgamation of Denny Hocking, Matt Tolbert and Nick Punto. But no frosted tips. Now with puns!

Entries in this blog

Why is Mike Pelfrey in the mix? I know why. You should read this to find out too because I have all the knowledge that you nee

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   You'll have to forgive me, I've been away. Did I read that Mike Pelfrey is being considered for the fifth starter spot? I believe I read that somewhere, but that can't be, right? I mean, he's tall and whatnot, but he hasn't been good since 2010. I know I've been absent from the baseball world, but time didn't spin all the way back around to 2010 again, did it? How could that happen to just the baseball world? Stop trying to confuse me. ANSWER ME!  
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

6

Monday Morning Madness: August 11, 2014

Weekend Recap Well said, me. Trevor May   I'm not going to dwell on May's debut. He was wild; he was nervous. It wouldn't shock me if we just witnessed one of May's only truly disastrous starts of his career. One start doesn't mean much to me. I still think that May can be a good 3rd/4th starter on a good team. I like his durability and the fact that his stuff can play better than a 3/4. I like that he seems to have an affable personality, likely perfect for shrugging off a rocky debut.   It wou
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

2

What if Torii had stayed all along?

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Back in 2007, the Twins were faced with a dilly of a difficult dilemma. Fan-favorite, team-leader, Morneau-puncher Torii Hunter was a free agent and he was going to be pricey. Ultimately, Hunter chose a larger offer from The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim or the Anaheim Angels or whatever they were called back then. Hunter returned to the team that drafted him about a month and a half ago. What if he had stayed the whole time? How would things
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

6

Twins to select 5th Hot Dog after Friday's Game

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Looking to bolster a somewhat depleted and disappointing hot dog rotation, the Minnesota Twins will add a fifth hot dog to their hot dog starting rotation. In order to make the best possible decision, the Twins will wait until after Friday night's game. While the new hot dog will not debut in front of the home crowd until after the current road trip, many fans are paying close attention to which hot dog will be selected.   Schweigert, the Twins' ho
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

4

Forgotten Twin? John Moses

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   My memories of John Moses   John Moses was a more notable former Twin to me than to just about anyone else in the World. The reason why comes from my Grandmother. She thought I looked like him. I remember being told that as a child and it confused me as an adult. Of course, I looked back at some images of myself from childhood, and you be the judge:   http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-adyk2veuRmI/UjC_oIw1eXI/AAAAAAAABAg/_kL1wxvxUCQ/s320/twomoses.jpg  
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

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Revisiting My 2014 Predictions

In the immortal words of Michael Jordan, "I'm back." Consider this the Wizards portion of my blogging career. It's all been the Wizards portion, so it should be easy to adjust.   Before the season started, I made 11 BOLD predictions. I had planned to make those predictions after the season, but the jagwagons who run the blogging cabal said that I had to make predictions before things actually happen. This will adversely affect my accuracy, but apparently that wasn't important. At this moment, I
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

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Monday Morning Madness: July 28, 2014

Weekend Recap   Who won the most recent game? Those of us with a healthy recency bias are pretty high on the Twins right now. Everyone else? Not so much.   Logan Darnell...sort of   Congratulations to Darnell for making his first MLB start on Saturday. He got lit up, but it's still a great moment for him. Darnell absolutely deserved this opportunity. He's slowly climbed through the Twins' system since being drafted in the 6th round in 2010. In 2014, he's made 17 AAA starts and has a 3.43 ERA. Wh
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

0

Forgotten Twin? Bernardo Brito

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   For those who are unfamiliar with this feature, I scour the most reliable internet sites to try to determine whether or not a former Minnesota Twin is forgotten or not. I use all the best sites – Wikipedia, Google, Bing, eBay, YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and Baseball Reference. If the player isn't featured to my liking, they are officially forgotten. The entire first paragraph will come from my own memory though. No guarantees for accuracy or in
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

3

How the worst MLB teams are rebuilding

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Not all bad teams are created equal. Some teams are bad for just one injury-plagued season. Some teams are bad for a few seasons and then good for a few seasons. Some teams are just chronically bad. Bad teams need to be changed. Bad teams have the benefit of receiving good draft picks, but other than that, they don't really gain any sort of advantage from being bad. Teams do not want to be bad. Bad teams can struggle to attract fans and free
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

13

Baseblol Cards: 1991 Score

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed! with all the images in tact. Note: There is a 20 image limit in posts here, which is totally fair, but that is why a few of the original images were changed to links.   When I close my eyes and think of baseball cards, I picture 1991 Score baseball cards. I'm not sure why, but this is the set that I picture when I dream of cards (which happens all the time). I distinctly remember that there were green, blue, white and black cards. I also rememb
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

3

Monday Morning Madness: August, 4, 2014

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Weekend Recap I managed to catch the entire series this weekend, but I also had a pretty nasty fever so I'm not really sure what I did and did not see. I've nearly recovered, but this is still going to be a bit on the short side because I'm all out of cool washcloths. I'm pretty sure I saw a beatdown on Sunday, but that just doesn't seem right. I know the Twins took two of three in Chicago and that's always fun.   Danny Santana My friend sent me
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

1

25 Minnesota Twins Drafts in 25 Days: 2004

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Hello again, Twins Daily. We are getting closer and closer to draft day. With a little over a week left until the Twins make their next draft choices, I present to you my recaps from 2001, 2002, and 2003. Just click the years to see which of those three drafts was the most handsome.   Here is 2004:   The 2003 draft produced Scott Baker and heartache. First-round pick Matt Moses never reached the Majors, marking the 3rd time in 6 years where t
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

5

Forgotten Twins? Fred Manrique

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Hey all, time for another installment of Forgotten Twins? If you don't remember, I scour the most important websites in the universe to determine if a particular Twins player is forgotten by society. I decided to sub out Bing for Fangraphs going forward. I thought it would be funny to use multiple search engines, but they're all the same, so the joke is on me. ENOUGH EXPLAINING!   My memories of Fred Manrique   This is going to sound awful, but
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

0

1991 Offseason in Review

Originally posted at K-Slow was Framed!   YOYOYO everybody! The offseason is upon us and the Twins have a lot of work to do. Coming off of another raging failure, the Front Office will need to pull off some sweet moves in order to make this team a contender. I have no clue what they will do and I have no desire to guess (at least not until later). Instead, I thought it would be fun to head back down Memory Lane and analyze each offseason since the Twins' last World Series. I'm not going to
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

4

Twins Starting Pitching Trade Targets?

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Yesterday, I started to delve into starting pitchers who I want the Twins to target in potential trades. I outlined five starters, three from the Cincinnati Reds. If you missed it, click here. Today, I have five more pitchers for you, free of charge! There are two legitimate "aces" on this list and both are almost certainly pipe dreams. That being said, it's fun to aim high. I hope the Twins aim high, because I'd love to be surprised by my fa
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

2

Uh, Manifesto I guess.

Baseball is certainly evolving. There are many experts. Their expertise comes from many different backgrounds. Some come from the scouting background, some come from a statistical background, some are journalists, and some are former baseball players. All of these experts have a lot to offer. Initially, I relied on the journalists and broadcasters to learn about baseball. As I got older, I read Moneyball, gave myself a Billy Beane haircut and started getting really into statistics. A coup
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

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Awardin' 2013: The American League!

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Welcome back to Award Season! In my previous installment, I handed out the major NL awards. If you missed it, click here. I also lamented the lack of an actual Awards Ceremony for these important honors. Think of the bowties and suspenders we are missing out on! Danny Valencia would look great in a suit, but he wouldn't get invited to the ceremony so we're kind of just back where we started, aren't we?   AL Breakout Player   Preseason Pick -
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

2

August Mailbag!

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   As always, these are actual questions written by someone and answered by me. I may also be that other someone. It's not a big deal.   Justin Morneau recently passed Bob Allison for fourth all-time in Twins' career home runs. Of course, he's still behind Allison in franchise history, but whatever. Morneau has 212 home runs and counting. Who will be the next Twins' player to pass Morneau on the all-time home run list?   Brad S., St. Paul, MN   G
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

5

The Tortured Minnesota Sports Fan Inventory

Originally posted at/developed for Kevin Slowey was Framed! You've heard of the MMPI? Well, here's the TMSFI! You haven't heard of the MMPI. Here: wikipedia.   I know, I know, this is supposed to be a Twins blog. Really, my blog is hardly that at this point, but you know what I'm generally trying to do. Thing is, with rain, days off and my own illness, I've only caught one Twins game since last weekend. I did analyze how the Twins players look in their caps, if you're really pining for
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

1

Introducing: The Eddie 400

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   If you've been reading my blog for the past few weeks, you are well aware that I have recently become obsessed with Eduardo Escobar. Not in a weird way. I just want to see more of him. Not in a weird way. I think he deserves more playing time. Last year, Escobar received just 179 plate appearances, but also had one of the most memorable plate appearances of the season, when he laced a walk-off double to give the Twins their first win of the 20
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

1

20 Twins Trades: Goodbye Johan

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed! I also wrote about the Carl Pavano mustache trade earlier this week. You can read it here. Ok, I'm going to need a second. It's just... it's hard to talk about this one. I mean... it's Johan. He was my favorite... PLAYER! BLAHAWAAWA! I'm sorry. I'm sorry! I can't do it! I'M JUST SO UPSET. I MEAN, HE'S JOHAN SANTANA, WHY DID THE TWINS HAVE TO TRADE HIM AWAY?!? ...   YOU'RE CRYING! ...   NO! JUST LEAVE ME... I DON'T NEED TO BLOW MY N
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

2

Friday Mailbag (4/5/2013)!!!!!

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed! What's more pathetic than a person writing questions to himself and then answering them, pretending all along that it is some hilarious endeavor or insightful method of talking about baseball? Not sure I can answer that question. Here's a (fake) mailbag instead.   How do you feel about Joe Mauer batting zecond? Love the podcast.   ~Brad S. (Twin Cities, MN)   I don't have a podcast. Yet...   Also, I assume you mean batting second. I am cool with
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

5

Friday Mailbag!!!!!

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   With the conclusion of my landmark 25 drafts in 25 days feature, I decided that I needed to stop relying so heavily on gimmicks. It's time to do some real analysis and actually offer something of value. No more insulting everyone with silly lists and bad photoshops. It's time to take things very seriously.   So, here's a fake mailbag:   What do you think of the Kohl Stewart pick? ~Prospect Guys, Twins Daily (question likely aimed at someone wit
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

8

5 Players the Twins gave up on waaaaaaay too early.

Originally posted at Kevin Slowey was Framed!   Pining for the past is something we're all guilty of. It's hard to see guys like Torii Hunter, David Ortiz and Carlos Gomez enjoying success with other franchises and not wonder what could have been. When those former players are breaking out or enjoying pseudo-Hall of Fame careers, it's hard to just look the other way. Heck, this one guy keeps writing about guys like Clete Thomas and continuously linking to it. Like this link, which you can cl
Brad Swanson

Brad Swanson

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