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About this blog

[FONT=Arial]Welcome to our Twins blog. We'll bring up some "facts" and "stats", from time to time, but our real strength lies in sarcasm, silliness and Yankee-baiting.[/FONT]

Entries in this blog

A Very Twins Opera

This weekend, baseball returns to the Twin Cities: in OPERA FORM!   "The Fix" is the latest in the Minnesota Opera's long running endeavor to bring new and distinct modern voices to an art form often seen as antiquated. It tells the story of the 1919 Chicago "Black" Sox, who conspired to lose the World Series in exchange for payoffs from a gambling syndicate. It's a dark chapter in the national past time's history, one that claimed the careers of both rookies and veterans, wise souls and dumb ki
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

2

#ParkBlossom: The Imagined Poetry of Byung-Ho Park

On perhaps the most beautiful day Minnesotans have seen in 2016, fans of the local ball club were treated to sunshine, cold beer and a dream-like state in which, we we had gone almost 48 whole hours without a loss.   But still there was unrest, muttering and snarls at the young hitters. "NOT A HOME RUN, MAUER!" when the resurgent catcher ripped a screamer up the middle, straight into a second baseman's glove. "SWING THE BAT, BIG BOY!" when Miguel Sano spat on border line pitch after border line
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

How To Win Every Byron Buxton Debate

For the last week a great many Twins fans have been fiercely debating the fate of top prospect Byron Buxton. As the most prominent minor leaguer for the local nine since Joe Mauer, Buxton has been tremendously appealing to fans from Apple Valley to Zumbrota, particularly as the Twins scramble to hold on to one of the AL Wild Cards.   Yet Twins Territory has been torn between demanding Buxton's arrival and ascendancy to greatness, and hedging in the name of cautious player development.   It may s
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

2

Why JT Chargois is better than A-Rod

It has not been an easy last two weeks for our Adopted Prospect: Mr. Jon Tiberius Chargois (okay it's Jon Thomas...but give me some nerd slack). He had his worst outing of the year giving up 6 earned runs on three walks and three hits, and the breezy dominance that made Chargois a Florida State League All-Star seems like a distant memory compared to his current form.   And yet, this weekend, as the Twins got snake bitten (again) by the Yankees and their complicated, record-book busting (again) D
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

The Cure for the Twins Offense

Though the Twins' offense has struggled to generate many runs in the month of June, their tremendous success in May and the method of their outburst against the White Sox yesterday reminds us all of what has worked for the team all year: Hit Clusters.   Now, the Twins, along with local business partners in the breakfast cereal industry are out to share the secret of their winning ways with the populace at large in this new advertisement for a special Twins Centric Cereal!   [Our first shot is of
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

3

Terry Ryan's Secret Ad

Many of you may be looking at the Twins roster for opening day and wondering: "where the hell are the prospects?"   Sure, we've been told again and again that we're about to get a huge influx of talent. And sure, we've been told that the children are our future. But the young players coming north: Danny Santana, Kennys Vargas, Oswaldo Arcia, Kyle Gibson...we've seen them all before...and the people we haven't seen: Blaine Boyer? Kurt Suzuki? Tim Stauffer? Are not the world changing prospects we'
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

4

My First Game

It's strange to say for someone who has written this blog for nearly seven years, but I've never written in depth about my first Twins game. But I have a good reason for that.   I don't really remember it.   I've tried to. I've imagined Kirby Puckett legging out a triple. I wishfully think that it was the Orioles so I can say that I saw Cal Ripken in the midst of his streak.   But I just don't remember it. Not the day. Not the year. Not the opponent. Not the outcome.   But I remember my grandfa
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

2

15 Resolutions for 2015

In the spirit of the New Year, we have 15 New Years Resolutions to offer for 15 key parts of Twins Territory.   The resolutions are available in our New Gallery Album "Resolutions"...which hopefully will turn up as part of this post   Any additions you want to make, or suggestions for how to make these resolutions more attainable are always welcome.
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

The Battle over Torii Hunter

He's back. Torii Hunter is back, and in the 7 hours of his official presence in a Twins line-up again there are two clear camps in response to his return.     In the blue corner, weighing in at 140 characters, 140,000 grey hairs in the last four seasons and 140 million liters of digital ink are the analytically minded, podcast savvy, SABR-metrical, writers, critics and yes...fans who wonder what the heck the Pohlad's were thinking.   "This is not the Torii Hunter we fell in love with," they remi
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

Laughing through the Pain: Another Way to Look at Twins Pitching

A year ago I offered an alternative statistic for measuring player worth--not in wins/losses, but in the far more useful field of entertaining the fan base: Amusement Above Replacement Player (AARP) for short. The statistic is measured in five key categories on a scale of -2 to +2, Play: Nickname: Physical Traits: Personality/Demeanor: Oddities: When added up, these statistics gives us a total AARP somewhere between -10 and +10.   Last year, even by the totally made up AARP statistic, t
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

2

An Unconventional Choice for the Next Twins Manager

Here's the truth. Both of us peanuts love Ron Gardenhire. We know that we're in the minority there...especially after the last four years...but c'mon, he looks like a little garden gnome. He's ADORABLE!   Seriously though, thank you for the support you provided and the lack of lawsuits you threw our way Gardy. You're a cool dude.   But now our attention turns to the real focus of the hour. Who will replace Gardy on the top of the Twins dugout step? http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v289/pammyb20
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

6

These Games DO Matter

You would be forgiven for assuming that this last week's worth of games did not matter. That things were irrelevant, unneccessary and wholly ornamental (well...for everyone but the Tigers).   But the truth is that these games have proven that we have good news in town again, a champion, a victor, a bonafide winner!   And that winner...is me. Yay for me!   Yes, all you loyal readers out there (which blogger seems to think is in the 1,000 range and I know is much closer to the 1.000 range), I have
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

2

Designated Everything

Most of the wise and trusted Twins blogs have noted that while the team's current offense, to put it politely, sucks harder than a Super Powered Hoover. Yet, they say, help is on the way from the prospect ranks--even if many of them are currently injured. http://cdn1.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/36315418/452114082.0_standard_352.0.jpg That's a big but... However, all that hope for the future comes with a caveat as big as Kenny Vargas' backside. To wit: most of the good hitters are not
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

Put Your Hands together for Joe Mauer

Since returning from the disabled list, Joe Mauer has been quietly reassembling himself, like a hitting terminator emerging from the blazing hell fires of suckitude, back into the consistent--if robotic--man we all know and respect. http://www.jamescamerononline.com/terminator221301.png Mauer mid-rehab stint While the hitting was something we all thought could return, we're glad to see that Mauer's defense has also been less terrible than in the past. We like to imagine that the reason for this
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

Joe Mauer, Michael Bradley and the Problem with Artistic Athletes

So I've been more or less completely consumed with the World Cup this month. Watching every match I can, reading interviews, reports, reviewing highlights, and writing like a maniac. But I still think of baseball (and can prove it with stuff on another blog), perhaps never more clearly than when I was watching a World Cup match with some friends last Thursday. We needed a point against Germany, or some good fortune in another match. Being Minnesota sports fans, we fully anticipated that everythi
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

A Twins Fan's Guide to the World Cup

The World Cup kicks off on Thursday--but whom to root for? Luckily, if you're a Twins fan, in your heart of hearts you already know, just follow our guide to find out.     You can also see the guide embedded in our own personal site at heavenlypeanuts.blogspot.com, and leave comments as to the foolishenss of likening Kent Hrbek to anything French.
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

5

Paying for Anticipation: An Adventure in Baseball Cards

Should you be inclined to see this post with some pictures of my ugly mug posing with the cards check out my main blog page. Otherwise...WORDS AHOY!   I finally did it. I told myself I ought to. I explained all the ways why. I made sure that I actually could do it, and then I did it.   I sold a large chunk of my baseball card collection.   It wasn't doing anything, it was sitting in a box in my attic. When my neighbor set up a yard sale and offered me a chance to sell some things, I went to get
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

2

Cliff Notes to the 2014 Twins: Ch. 1 May

We know how it is. Life is busy: with work and family and social engagements, there are a lot of demands on your time. So, if you tune out for a while during the long season, you're perfectly normal. Missing baseball games is not unlike missing reading assignments for school, so we're happy to provide this series of Cliff Notes to summarize, explain and analyze the story that is the 2014 Twins Season. (This post is illuminated with pretty pretty pictures on our personal site: Peanuts From Heaven
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

Why I Always Come Back

It hasn't been easy being a Twins fan the last few years (though if you're committed enough to the team to find my little corner of the blogosphere, I hardly need tell you that). It's been even less easy to be a positive Twins blogger, to dedicate time and energy to finding the silver linings in a team that often looks outmatched in almost every facet of the game. My writing life would be easier, and probably more pleasant, if I could just sign off from the blog, let it wither and dry up like th
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

The Twins' New Year's Resolutions

It's been a while since our last post (blahblahblah job, blahblahblah earning salary, blahblahblah spending holiday time with friends and loved ones). But we're back with a very special post as we consider the 2014 resolutions of your Minnesota Twins. Joe Mauer Baseball Resolution: Hit like a boss now that defense doesn't crush my legs. Life Resolution: Be hospitable while hosting my fellow all-stars this summer, maybe even say multi-syllabic words to them! Brian Dozer Baseball Resolution: Prove
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

The Ken Burns' Test

In one week, the Hall of Fame will announce who (if anyone) was elected to Cooperstown. There are a privileged few who get to vote for those hallowed halls, but just because most bloggers don't have a say, doesn't mean we can't use our blogs to have a say about literally everything else, including silly little exercises in analyzing Hall of Fame voting. Last year I offered an economist's sense of how to vote in order to maximize your ballot. This year, as I continue to avoid numbers at all costs
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

1

A Winter Meeting's Guide to Twinsey World

Monday marks the kickoff of the Winter Meetings in Orlando, Florida (aka: a convenient holiday for baseball executives and their families). Naturally, as the Twins do their part at the Winter Meetings for the next four days, they may make time to have a little fun in the Happiest Place on Earth That is Also a Festering Swamp. But the attractions they see may have extra ramifications on their plans for the next four days. Here we present the possible outcomes of how what they see and could manife
PeanutsFromHeaven

PeanutsFromHeaven

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